I’ve found over the years that practicing gratitude isn’t just about listing things I’m thankful for. It’s about fully embodying a sense of appreciation that reaches into all aspects of life. In one of my past blog posts, Why I Spend 30 Days Focused on Gratitude, I shared my personal journey of committing to a month of gratitude each year. This practice transformed my perspective. Making me not only happier, but more resilient in the face of life’s ups and downs. I truly believe gratitude is key to a fulfilling life. Why not join me in experiencing its powerful effects.

The Science Behind Gratitude and Happiness

When we look at the research, the benefits of gratitude are undeniable. Gratitude has been studied extensively, and its benefits go far beyond that warm feeling we get when we think about what we’re thankful for. Research from Harvard Medical School reveals that gratitude actually rewires our brains to make us happier, healthier, and more resilient. According to the article Giving Thanks Can Make You Happier, those who actively practice gratitude experience more positive emotions. They feel more alive, sleep better, express more compassion and kindness. They even have stronger immune systems. With this in mind, the science is clear: gratitude isn’t just an emotion; it’s a powerful tool for creating a happier, more fulfilling life.

8 Ways Gratitude Boosts Happiness

In a blog post by Grateful.org, gratitude is highlighted as a powerful way to boost happiness through eight specific pathways.

1. Improved Relationships: Gratitude strengthens our connections with others, making us feel more valued and appreciated.
2. Enhanced Self-Worth: By focusing on what we’re grateful for, we shift our attention away from self-criticism, building a more positive self-image.
3. Greater Resilience: Gratitude provides perspective during difficult times, helping us focus on what we have instead of what we lack.
4. Reduced Stress: A focus on gratitude allows our minds to escape the stress cycle by emphasizing what’s going well.
5. Better Sleep: Practicing gratitude before bed can help calm the mind, setting us up for a restful night.
6. Boosted Physical Health: Studies have shown that grateful people tend to take better care of their health, engaging in behaviors like exercise, better nutrition, and regular check-ups.
7. Increased Empathy and Kindness: Gratitude enhances our ability to see the good in others, making us more understanding and compassionate.
8. Sustained Positive Emotions: Over time, gratitude promotes a more lasting sense of joy by helping us savor the small moments in life.

When we practice gratitude, we train our minds to notice the beauty and kindness around us. And over time, that shift in perspective builds a happier, more fulfilling life.

Gratitude and the 24 Character Strengths

In positive psychology, gratitude is recognized as one of the 24 Character Strengths. According to the VIA Character Institute, these strengths are like a toolkit for a fulfilling life. And gratitude is a powerful piece of that toolkit. Gratitude is a strength that can be developed, practiced, and embodied. It has the power to influence our outlook and enrich our lives.

If you haven’t taken the VIA Character Strengths assessment, I encourage you to do so. It’s a free tool that helps you understand your unique strengths, showing how gratitude fits into the larger picture of who you are. When we recognize gratitude as a core strength, we give ourselves permission to lean into it, using it as a foundation for growth, connection, and resilience.

Gratitude Through Life’s Challenges: An Exercise in Resilience

One of the most beautiful aspects of gratitude is its ability to ground us even in challenging times. Life is filled with moments of both joy and struggle. Although it’s easy to feel grateful when things are going well, real growth happens when we find ways to appreciate life’s difficulties too.

Try this exercise: Think of someone or something you’re deeply grateful for. Let yourself feel the warmth and fullness of that gratitude. Now, imagine going back in time to see all the steps that led to that moment. Perhaps there were difficult situations, unexpected turns, or even losses along the way. We may not have felt grateful in those moments, but looking back, we can see how each one was a stepping stone that led us here. Recognizing this can be incredibly empowering—it reminds us that even our struggles can bear gifts.

This perspective is echoed in the inspiring story of a young man who lost his leg at age 10, yet through it, found a deep sense of resilience. In a powerful video, he shares how embracing gratitude gave him the strength to rebuild his life, focusing not on what was lost but on what could be gained. His story is a reminder that even in the darkest of times, gratitude offers us a way forward, helping us find light amid shadows.

Daily Gratitude: Building a Happier, More Resilient Life

Research shows that gratitude becomes even more powerful when we make it part of our daily routine. When we approach each day with an open heart, looking for moments of beauty and kindness, we start to notice more good things. Our lives begin to feel more peaceful and joyful because we’re actively tuning into the gifts around us. Small, consistent acts of gratitude—like keeping a gratitude journal, expressing appreciation to loved ones, or simply taking a moment to savor something beautiful—can create lasting happiness.

But practicing gratitude every day isn’t about glossing over the hard stuff or pretending everything is perfect. It’s about choosing to see the good that exists alongside the challenges. Harvard’s research shows that when we regularly practice gratitude, we not only feel happier in the moment, but we also cultivate a lasting sense of contentment. We begin to find joy in the present instead of waiting for things to get “better.” This shift in perspective brings us a deep sense of peace.

Imagine, for a moment, starting each day with a sense of openness, asking yourself, “What am I grateful for today?” Over time, this simple habit becomes transformative. You’ll begin to notice beauty in places you might not have noticed before. As well as experience a deeper connection with yourself and those around you.

When we practice embracing gratitude for a happier, resilient life, we’re choosing to build a reserve of positivity that supports us through life’s inevitable challenges. The beauty of gratitude is that it’s available to us at any moment. Whether we’re celebrating a joyful occasion or navigating a difficult one, it’s a tool for seeing the bigger picture. As well as for recognizing that even in the most challenging circumstances, there is something to be grateful for.

Join Our 10-Day Gratitude Challenge

You now see how transfmormative gratitude is. How it’s something that can be cultivated with intention. If you’re ready to start embracing gratitude for a happier, resilient life, I invite you to join me in our 10-day Gratitude Challenge,  which starts on November 19 and culminates on Thanksgiving Day. Over these ten days, we’ll explore different ways to bring gratitude into our lives. From reflecting on past blessings, to appreciating the present moment. Each day, we’ll take a step closer to cultivating a practice that not only brings happiness but also strengthens our ability to face life’s ups and downs with grace.

This journey is a chance to dive deeper, to discover the power of gratitude, and to make it a part of who we are. When we look through the lens of gratitude, we see that even the hardest moments carry the seeds of beauty, strength, and transformation and we begin to make it a practice that stays with us long after November ends.

Here’s to a season of gratitude—and to a happier, more resilient life.

The post Embracing Gratitude for a Happier Resilient Life appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

For me, this shift has been personal lately. Just five days ago, Mark had surgery on his foot after stepping on a nail. Suddenly our routine changed. He’s depending on me more than usual, and as much as I love caring for him, it’s a reminder of how easily life can become overwhelming when we forget to care for ourselves too.

These past few days have taught me the importance of self-love and compassion—not just for him, but for me too. And maybe this is the perfect message for today, as autumn begins to invite us to turn inward and nurture ourselves.

The beauty of fall is that it naturally slows us down and gives us time to embrace autumnal renewal. While spring and summer are filled with outward movement, activity, and connection, autumn offers us a much-needed pause. It’s a time to reconnect with our own inner world, to rediscover what ignites our passion, and to tend to our own needs. Whether that’s emotional, physical, or spiritual. Time to Embrace Autumnal Renewal.

Your Self

As we transition into fall (even if the weather isn’t quite there yet), it’s the perfect opportunity to pause and reflect on how we’ve been caring for our Self. For me, the last five days of being in caregiver mode reminded me that if I don’t also tend to my own needs, burnout is inevitable. This is why I always advocate for me time—something I’ve been trying to carve out, even if it’s just for a moment here or there.

What does this look like for you? Perhaps it’s taking a walk outside. Enjoying the changing leaves (or the lingering warmth!). Or maybe it’s restarting a yoga or meditation practice that got lost in the busy days of summer. Autumn is your invitation to slow down and find balance.

The earlier sunsets and longer nights also offer a natural rhythm for rest. This is the perfect time to sleep in, go to bed early, or simply enjoy the quiet moments that come with the change of seasons. And if you’ve been putting off those health check-ups or self-care routines, use this shift as a reminder to prioritize yourself.

When we care for our Self, we’re not just filling our own cup—we’re actually making space to care for those we love, without feeling depleted. Trust me, both Mark and I could use a little extra self-love and compassion right now!

Your Soul

While caring for your Self is essential, your Soul also needs attention. Your Soul is your deeper purpose, your reason for being. For me, these past few days of caregiving have been a reminder of the importance of finding meaning in both the big and small moments.

Sometimes, we get so caught up in the day-to-day that we forget to connect with what lights us up inside. What’s your “why”? Why are you here, and what meaningful contribution do you want to make in the world?

Autumn offers a beautiful time to reflect on your purpose. If you’ve written a mission statement or have a guiding vision, this is the perfect moment to revisit it, reflect on how it aligns with your current life, and make adjustments if needed. If you don’t have one yet, consider using this season to explore what makes your Soul feel alive.

Your Dreams

Unlike the fast pace of summer, filled with activities and fleeting whims, autumn creates a natural pause. A chance to reflect on what it is we really desire—not the fleeting, impulsive dreams, but those rooted in our hearts. These are the dreams that bring lasting fulfillment because they come from our core.

This slowing down is a gift. It gives us the time to sift through our desires, releasing the ones that no longer serve us and holding onto those that ignite a fire within. Take a moment to ask yourself:

• What has been calling to me lately, something I may have pushed aside in the rush of daily life?
• What do I long to create or experience that feels aligned with my soul’s purpose?
• How can I use this time of seasonal transition to clarify my vision for the future?

Dreams rooted in passion are like seeds—fall offers the perfect time to plant those seeds in the rich soil of our intentions, knowing that they will grow, slowly but surely. This isn’t about hurried action or quick results. It’s about honoring your process and allowing space for your dreams to unfold naturally, just as the trees release their leaves to make way for new growth.

It’s also a time to trust that the dreams born in this reflective space are not just whims—they are your inner guidance calling you toward your highest potential. As the leaves fall and nature turns inward, use this season to give your dreams the space they need to evolve.

Time to Embrace Autumnal Renewal

In this season of renewal and reflection, I encourage you to reconnect with these three essential parts of yourself: Your Self, Your Soul, and Your Dreams. If the unpredictable weather and the demands of life are pulling you in different directions, remember that autumn gives you permission to slow down, to reflect, and to prioritize what truly matters.

As for me, between the warmth of the sun today and the cool nights ahead, I’m taking this time to care for myself too. If these last few days have taught me anything, it’s that self-compassion is just as important as the care we give to others.

Looking for ideas to get you started?

Here are some activities to help you embrace autumnal renewal and realign with your Self, your Soul, and your Dreams during this transformative season:

1. Forest Bathing or Mindful Nature Walks

Take advantage of the cooler temperatures and the stunning fall colors. Find a quiet trail or forest path and allow yourself to walk slowly, using all your senses to connect with the environment. Notice the changing leaves. The crispness in the air. The sounds of rustling branches. Use this time to reflect on your current state of being and where you want to focus your energy moving forward. Maybe come to Eclectic Sanctuary and lets Forest Bathe together. https://www.eclecticwellbeing.com/ForestBathing2022

2. Journaling by Candlelight

As the days get shorter and darkness arrives earlier, carve out time in the evenings for journaling by the soft glow of a candle. Write about your desires, your passions, and what dreams are surfacing for you. What have you always wanted to do but never made time for? How can you align your actions with those deeper desires this season?

3. Create a Vision Board for Autumn

While vision boards are often seen as a New Year’s activity, fall is a great time to revisit or create a vision board. This time, focus not just on goals, but on how you want to feel as you move through this season. What emotional states are you striving for? What qualities do you want to embody as you work toward your dreams?

4. Evening Fireside Reflection

If you have access to an outdoor space, light a small bonfire or gather around a fire pit. Use this time to meditate or simply reflect on what you need to release to make space for your dreams. Just as we let go of limiting beliefs at our fall retreats, you can write down anything holding you back and toss it into the fire, watching it dissolve and create space for something new.

5. Autumn Recipe Creation with Fresh Herbs

Engage in the grounding practice of cooking with seasonal ingredients and fresh herbs. As you prepare meals, reflect on the ways nourishment fuels both your body and your dreams. Consider how slowing down to enjoy the simple pleasures of food can also mirror slowing down to savor the journey toward your goals.

6. Yoga Nidra for Dream Clarity

Yoga Nidra is a guided meditation practice that helps access the subconscious mind. Try incorporating a Yoga Nidra session into your evening routine this fall to explore the dreams that are buried beneath the surface. This deeply relaxing practice can bring you clarity on your soul’s purpose and the next steps toward manifesting your dreams. You can schedule your own Yoga Nidra session with me simply by requesting a date and time. https://www.eclecticwellbeing.com/YogaNidraScheduler

7. Daily Gratitude Practice

Fall is a season of gratitude. Why not use this time to reflect daily on the blessings in your life? By practicing gratitude, you bring your focus to abundance rather than lack. This creates a fertile environment for your dreams to grow. Write down three things you’re grateful for every morning or evening, and watch how it shifts your mindset. And why not sign up for our annual Gratitude Challenge in November. This year we’ve culled it down to 10 days, but 10 days of deliberate action designed to embrace and embody living in gratitude.  https://www.eclecticwellbeing.com/GratitudeChallenge

8. Connecting with a Soul Community

Sometimes, the best way to nurture your dreams is to share them with others. Attend a fall retreat, join a mindful hike, or participate in a group meditation session. Being in a community of like-minded individuals can inspire new ideas and provide the support you need to stay connected to your passions.

Mind & Meditation: A Journey Within

As we embrace the slower rhythm of fall and the opportunity to align with our deepest desires, I invite you to take this journey further with our Mind & Meditation series this November. Over the course of four weeks, we will explore mindfulness and meditation. As well as, discover practices that help quiet the noise of the outside world. And reconnect you with your inner Self and your soul’s purpose.

Whether you are seeking clarity on your dreams, struggling with life’s transitions, or simply needing space to breathe, this series will offer you the tools to create inner peace, align with your passions, and manifest a life filled with joy.

To join me in person at Lake Michigan College, register through Eventbrite, https://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-mind-meditation-a-4-week-series-connecting-mindset-mindfulness-and-tickets-1004534017287

Or sign for our digital series and learn at your own pace at https://www.eclecticwellbeing.com/MindTraining2023

This fall, I encourage you to go inward. A time to Embrace Autumnal Renewal. Taking time to honor the aspects of your being that need attention—your Self, your Soul, and your Dreams. What will your autumn renewal look like?

The post Manifest Monday: Time to Embrace Autumnal Renewal appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

A number of years ago I stopped making New Year’s Resolutions or even Intentions. I simply decided to choose a word and apply that to my life for the year. Choosing the word is done somewhat randomly each year. In 2020, I was at a NY meditation practice and the word Zest was spoken.  I had been thinking about that word as it’s also one of the 24 VIA Character Strengths and one that I did not use often enough. I decided that word showing up was a sign for it to be my word for the year. Imagine, focusing on Zest in my life in 2020. The Universe gave me a challenge and I obliged.

Trust the Universe

In 2021, Mark and I were in the midst of bankruptcy and legal issues regarding the closing of our Yoga studio. I wanted it all to be over and just move on, but I knew that wasn’t going to happen. I had to trust the process. Lawsuits and bankruptcy take time, and patience was needed.

We had also just launched Eclectic Well-Being and were venturing into the unknown of not just owning our coaching business but creating it together. We had owned the Yoga studio together, but being a franchise, we were more like operators. Eclectic Well-Being was our creation. We were doing it together! I had to trust that we could do this and more: work together, play together, create together, make a living together and keep our marriage strong. Trust was the obvious word for 2021.

Learning to Surrender

A few months before New Year’s 2022, I made a decision to move to Michigan and open a small retreat center. A place that guests could come to relax, as well as be coached or practice Yoga or meditation or forest bathing. When I first told Mark of this decision, he was not interested. I loved him, but I knew in my heart I needed to create this space. I put it out there and kept talking about it, trusting he would come around. And finally, during a mindset retreat in Costa Rica, he did! Trust was working.

Then we announced our move to Michigan to our kids, and my daughter, was not happy to say the least. It felt as if I would break her heart leaving her home in New Jersey. I started having second thoughts. Unsure if my decision was the right one.

As I was working on my vision board, the word Surrender jumped off the page of a magazine and I somehow, I just knew, that was my word!

It showed up time and time again.

Looking at properties up and down the east coast, but always something just not quite right, surrendering that one will come along. Finding the right one on a gut feeling, in Michigan, just when I was about to give up! Selling our house soon after finding Eclectic Sanctuary. My daughter coming around and seeing the beauty and synchronicity in the property now called Eclectic Sanctuary.

Surrendering when we were dragged back into legal issues I had no control over.

Surrender even showed up at our annual Mindset Retreat!

The word was everywhere! What a year! But I am finally able to let go of the things I cannot change and Surrender that the Universe always has my back.

Signs are Everywhere

In December I started thinking about what word would be my word for this new year. A year once again filled with changes. Living in Michigan. Getting Eclectic Sanctuary up and running. Navigating life without my New Jersey Tribe, but reconnecting with friends and family back in the Midwest.

I haven’t been reading much and one evening decided to find a book I could read at my leisure. No self-help book, but something inspiring. Opening up an unpacked box of books, Becoming by Michelle Obama was on top. Hana, my daughter recommended it years ago. I bought it and it sat on my bookshelf until being packed for the move to Michigan. Why not? It seemed to be calling to me.

In the preface, Michelle talks about her aspirations and how they have changed throughout her life. How we ask children, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” and expect an answer to this pointless question “As if growing up is finite,” Michelles states. “As if at some point you become something and that’s the end.”

These words connected with me. Afterall, I’ve been reinventing myself my entire life. I am always becoming.

Then, a day or two later, I began researching quotes about failure for my digital 7 Day MindShift Course and found this one from Fredrick Lenz.

“There is no such thing as completion. These are only stages in an endless progression. There are no final outcomes or decisions, since nothing ever stays the same.”

We are always Becoming.

I knew then that no matter how unoriginal it seems to use Michelle Obama’s book title, my word for 2023 had to be Becoming.

This year, and every year, I am Becoming. I have never grown up. I continue to become who I am meant to be.

My life has no destination other than death, and I am no hurry to get there.

Rather my life is a journey of endless progression. An endless process of Becoming.

This year I am becoming an owner of Eclectic Sanctuary. I am becoming an herb farmer. I will become a caretaker for a flock of chickens in the spring. Mark is becoming a ________ ­­­­­(it’s still a secret, but hopefully soon we can share!).

I am becoming stronger. Becoming more patient. I’m becoming calmer. And becoming more compassionate.

I am becoming more of who I am meant to be!

Who are you Becoming this year?

What word will guide you in 2023?

Discover more about Eclectic Well-Being and Eclectic Sanctuary by following us on Social Media and signing up for our monthly newsletter.

Watch as I continue to Become.

The post Life is an Endless Progression of BECOMING. appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

Throughout my years of personal development, emotions always seem to have a way of finding themselves in the theory of living a better life.

Control  your emotions.

You have moving toward and moving away emotions, a theory of Tony Robbins.

Feel your emotions in the moment.

All sorts of guidance to living a better life by somehow managing your emotions.

But have you ever looked at emotions as an observer? Seeing them through the lens of a scientist. Noticing the cause and effect, but not trying to change them.

And really, what are these things called emotions?

The other day, in the Explore Laugh Play group, our activity was watching cartoons.  I chose to watch Care Bears, a cartoon where each bear is a particular emotion. Then there was a movie from a few years ago, I think it was called Inside Out. It was a children’s movie, all about our internal feelings. Our emotions.

So, emotions are how we feel about things that happen in our lives.

But how do we decide to feel one way or another?

Why do some things make us feel happy and other things make us feel sad, and other things may make us angry? And why do they not have the same effect on everyone? We all experience emotions differently. Why is that?

An Internal Feedback System

After much thought and enlightenment from numerous books and seminars, I’ve come to realize our emotions are simply our internal feedback system. What are they giving us feedback on?  Good question.

I believe it’s feedback on our values. On what is important to us. What we believe to be important.

When we feel happy, that is our internal feedback system letting us know that the current situation is something we have placed a high value on. Because things we value, are important to us. They make us happy.

When we get angry, (which I used to tell my children to avoid, but boy how wrong that was), it is again feedback that whatever just happened is not aligned with our values. In fact, what makes us angry is usually in complete contradiction to our values.

However, I’ve learned more recently, that trying to avoid our anger doesn’t support us. In fact, it hurts us. It doesn’t allow us to truly be our authentic selves. When we avoid anger, we also avoid acknowledging what we value. Again, what is most important to us.

When we observe and listen to the feedback our emotions provide for us, and we continue to focus on our values, that is when we are in the present moment, being exactly who we are meant to be.

Let Emotions Guide, Not Control

Utilizing this guidance system though doesn’t mean allowing it to take full control. That could result in allowing our amygdala to take over, letting ourselves go into a Fight, Flight, or Freeze response. We know when we engage the sympathetic nervous system, we are not in our most powerful state. We are in survival mode, which can save us from danger, but it rarely, if ever, allows us to grow and become more of who we are meant to be.

When we can allow our emotions to surface, and we can observe them without allowing them to control our actions, we can gain a better understanding of our values and our belief system.

So the next time you feel angry, sad, excited, or scared, stop and observe. What is causing this emotion? How is aligned with my values? What values surface with this emotion, either in alignment or out of alignment. Allow yourself to feel, without becoming the emotion. We are not our emotions, they are just our guidance system.

The post Emotions – Our Internal Feedback System appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

Last week Mark wrote about our quest to find the perfect spot for our Eclectic Sanctuary and perhaps grow some culinary herbs. We thought we found the spot, but after further insight, further introspection, we realized those 3 massive barns were not it. No matter how much we wanted it to be, the house just didn’t work for our lifestyle.

We almost put in an offer.

We almost got so wrapped up in the new “shiny object” that we forgot what is most important.

See the barns were amazing. The whole property was amazing! The idea of US owning them and making it into this herb farm where folks could come get fresh herbs and maybe even take a cooking class was drawing us in.

There was plenty of space for farming. The barns could be repurposed for drying out herbs. We had space to construct some greenhouses. The kitchen was most certainly large enough to host a class.

Square Peg – Round Hole

So, what was most important, where living in this home would have been much like trying to get a square peg in a round hole?

Ultimately it was the importance of entertaining friends and family.

Mark and I do not host big parties or have gatherings every week. But when we do have friends and family over, we like to hang out in an area that is comforting, brings nature inside, and where we can cook and still be part of the conversation.

On Thanksgiving, we ultimately enjoy preparing dinner together while also partaking in all the conversations with family because our kitchen is open to a space where everyone gathers.

No matter how hard we tried to make this house meet our desires and become our home, allowing us to enjoy living in it, it just didn’t fit.

And we tried.  I sketched out numerous plans and ideas, but there was just no way to connect the beautiful entertaining room to the kitchen and no way to have a bright airy bedroom and not take away from public space.

So here we are, back to step one.

We could have saved much time and energy had we had more clarity on what is most important to us.

See, we set out with an idea. A rough framework. We gave a guide to our realtor. It was pretty specific, but it didn’t express what was most important.

One must be perfectly clear about what brings them joy if they are to find joy.

Mark and I were looking at all the opportunities that had come into mind since starting this journey: Farm Stay, Herbs, Chickens, and being close to the Delaware River towns.

When we started this quest, it was all about having a few guestrooms and then space to host Wellness Retreats.  I intentionally wasn’t clear about specifics because I thought there could be numerous ways to make this work.

But ultimately, my goal was and is to be financially self-sustainable and also live a life I love. Every single day!

I realize now these two things are what is truly important to me. My true desire is not having a small retreat center. My true desire is to create a life I love where I am financially self-sustainable.

So when this opportunity of a farm came into view, and it had a pool where I could host Aqua Yoga classes, it seemed we found IT! We found the property where we could manifest our dreams.

What I wasn’t clear about, was my personal life needs and desires. How I want to live when not working.

So last week after our second trip up there, I started drawing new plans. Researching other possibilities. But nothing worked. I was ready to just make an offer and figure it out later. There had to be a way, right? How could we let this opportunity pass us by?

And then it hit me.

Listen to Your Heart

I sat quietly and listened to my heart. I listened to my desires of how I wanted to wake up in the morning with the sun shining in through my windows.

How I want to continue to have family over for Thanksgiving and be able to congregate in a shared space of nature and food as well as be accessible to everyone in my family, something that would not be the case in this house.

How I wanted to relax in the evening. Spending time noticing the sun set while maybe turning on the TV for a show or two.

And my heart was sad.

No matter how we remodeled or changed the flow of the house, it was not conducive to our way of living.

And it was not really helping me get to being financially self-sustainable.

Making all these changes was going to be expensive. At least $100K to $200K. Using up a lot of funds that could be better purposed toward financial sustainability.

And my heart wouldn’t be happy?

And what about money to start the farm? Buy a tractor, seeds, a greenhouse?

I put away the sketches and plans for the house and sat down and wrote what was most important to me in living my life. Mark was out shooting pool, so I had plenty of time to think alone.

Integrating Our Desires

The next morning, I asked Mark to make a list of what is most important to him. How he sees us living our lives say 5 years from now.  I didn’t share my list at this point as I didn’t want to influence his desires.

His list was a bit different. But there was some overlap.

But the overlap is not our combined vision. It is the totality of both visions that is our combined vision.

I cannot ignore Mark’s desire for land just as he can’t ignore my desire for still wanting to teach at FIT. That would be sacrificing our own individual desires and would probably leave one of us feeling a bit unsatisfied.

Our list is longer now. It may be harder to find that perfect property.

BUT MAYBE NOT.

See now we have an easy way to say yes or no. We go to our list. How many boxes does it check off? We now have complete clarity of what we are looking for. Will there be adjustments and compromises? Sure. But knowing what is most important, makes the decision-making process much simpler.

Today we are headed out again to look at some areas and properties: 2 open houses and a few drive-bys. We will see what the universe decides to show us now that we have clarity on what’s most important.

The post What’s Most Important appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

Sunday, March 20 is International Day of Happiness, a day set aside by the UN to celebrate Happiness across the globe.

But many of us may be wondering, “How do we celebrate happiness when there is so much violence, destruction, and despair happening right now?”

And it’s not just in Ukraine. Yes, Ukraine is a terrible situation and many like me are struggling to keep believing and trusting in the Universe. But I know losing hope would not help anyone.

Besides Ukraine, what about those who suffer every day? Those that rarely feel the emotion of happiness. People that great each day with a thought of when will this pain and suffering end.

Those that suffer from depression.

Depression is the #1 cause of disability in the United States among 15-44-year-olds, according to the National Network of Depression Centers. Imagine that. Being in the prime of your life and your feelings of worthlessness have so much control, you are deemed disabled. Unable to live your life. Unable to feel Happiness.

However, 80% of those treated for depression show an improvement in symptoms in just four to six weeks. But yet, only 33% of those with depression actually seek treatment. There is still a stigma on getting help for mental illness. This leads millions of adults to never experience feelings of happiness.

Yet here we have a day created to celebrate this emotion. This feeling that many find beyond their reach.

How do we celebrate happiness knowing so many others are in a dark place. They are feeling emotions much stronger than our experiences of sadness?

It’s a great question. But we cannot put our lives or our emotions at bay as we watch a loved one further isolate or sink deeper into depression.

Yet it may seem selfish to go about being Happy, celebrating our joys and life’s milestones.

We all have a happiness set point.

Some research shows that 50% of our happiness is genetics. Another 10% of our happiness is external (the reason why things don’t make us truly happy for very long). And then 40% of happiness is “intentional activity.” That activity we choose to take.

When a person is depressed, they may already be starting with a low happiness set point. When you add on their depression, their feelings of happiness are null.

So back to the question, how to celebrate our own happiness when so many others are suffering from depression or are living in the turmoil happening in the world right now?

We must take action.

That intentional activity that can help determine that natural set point can include compassionate actions to help others. Spreading kindness, giving to charities that are helping those unable to experience happiness right now, listening to a loved one. All these intentional actions can help bring more happiness into the world. It may not bring immediate bursts of joy, but if we spread our happiness, surely that energy must find its way to help those suffering.

So tomorrow, on this year’s International Day of Happiness 2022, I will be spreading kindness. I will give to a charity to help those suffering from depression. And I will be there for those in my life who currently struggle with finding any happiness.

It is especially important that in the darkest of days, we find a way to shine some light, to bring a small sense of happiness to those in suffering.

If you feel inclined to give, here are some wonderful organizations trying to make the world a bit brighter.

National Network of Depression Centers https://nndc.org/donate/

National Suicide Prevention LifeLine https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/donate/

GEM – Global Empowerment Mission https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/donate/

World Central Kitchen https://wck.org/

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