A number of years ago I stopped making New Year’s Resolutions or even Intentions. I simply decided to choose a word and apply that to my life for the year. Choosing the word is done somewhat randomly each year. In 2020, I was at a NY meditation practice and the word Zest was spoken.  I had been thinking about that word as it’s also one of the 24 VIA Character Strengths and one that I did not use often enough. I decided that word showing up was a sign for it to be my word for the year. Imagine, focusing on Zest in my life in 2020. The Universe gave me a challenge and I obliged.

Trust the Universe

In 2021, Mark and I were in the midst of bankruptcy and legal issues regarding the closing of our Yoga studio. I wanted it all to be over and just move on, but I knew that wasn’t going to happen. I had to trust the process. Lawsuits and bankruptcy take time, and patience was needed.

We had also just launched Eclectic Well-Being and were venturing into the unknown of not just owning our coaching business but creating it together. We had owned the Yoga studio together, but being a franchise, we were more like operators. Eclectic Well-Being was our creation. We were doing it together! I had to trust that we could do this and more: work together, play together, create together, make a living together and keep our marriage strong. Trust was the obvious word for 2021.

Learning to Surrender

A few months before New Year’s 2022, I made a decision to move to Michigan and open a small retreat center. A place that guests could come to relax, as well as be coached or practice Yoga or meditation or forest bathing. When I first told Mark of this decision, he was not interested. I loved him, but I knew in my heart I needed to create this space. I put it out there and kept talking about it, trusting he would come around. And finally, during a mindset retreat in Costa Rica, he did! Trust was working.

Then we announced our move to Michigan to our kids, and my daughter, was not happy to say the least. It felt as if I would break her heart leaving her home in New Jersey. I started having second thoughts. Unsure if my decision was the right one.

As I was working on my vision board, the word Surrender jumped off the page of a magazine and I somehow, I just knew, that was my word!

It showed up time and time again.

Looking at properties up and down the east coast, but always something just not quite right, surrendering that one will come along. Finding the right one on a gut feeling, in Michigan, just when I was about to give up! Selling our house soon after finding Eclectic Sanctuary. My daughter coming around and seeing the beauty and synchronicity in the property now called Eclectic Sanctuary.

Surrendering when we were dragged back into legal issues I had no control over.

Surrender even showed up at our annual Mindset Retreat!

The word was everywhere! What a year! But I am finally able to let go of the things I cannot change and Surrender that the Universe always has my back.

Signs are Everywhere

In December I started thinking about what word would be my word for this new year. A year once again filled with changes. Living in Michigan. Getting Eclectic Sanctuary up and running. Navigating life without my New Jersey Tribe, but reconnecting with friends and family back in the Midwest.

I haven’t been reading much and one evening decided to find a book I could read at my leisure. No self-help book, but something inspiring. Opening up an unpacked box of books, Becoming by Michelle Obama was on top. Hana, my daughter recommended it years ago. I bought it and it sat on my bookshelf until being packed for the move to Michigan. Why not? It seemed to be calling to me.

In the preface, Michelle talks about her aspirations and how they have changed throughout her life. How we ask children, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” and expect an answer to this pointless question “As if growing up is finite,” Michelles states. “As if at some point you become something and that’s the end.”

These words connected with me. Afterall, I’ve been reinventing myself my entire life. I am always becoming.

Then, a day or two later, I began researching quotes about failure for my digital 7 Day MindShift Course and found this one from Fredrick Lenz.

“There is no such thing as completion. These are only stages in an endless progression. There are no final outcomes or decisions, since nothing ever stays the same.”

We are always Becoming.

I knew then that no matter how unoriginal it seems to use Michelle Obama’s book title, my word for 2023 had to be Becoming.

This year, and every year, I am Becoming. I have never grown up. I continue to become who I am meant to be.

My life has no destination other than death, and I am no hurry to get there.

Rather my life is a journey of endless progression. An endless process of Becoming.

This year I am becoming an owner of Eclectic Sanctuary. I am becoming an herb farmer. I will become a caretaker for a flock of chickens in the spring. Mark is becoming a ________ ­­­­­(it’s still a secret, but hopefully soon we can share!).

I am becoming stronger. Becoming more patient. I’m becoming calmer. And becoming more compassionate.

I am becoming more of who I am meant to be!

Who are you Becoming this year?

What word will guide you in 2023?

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Watch as I continue to Become.

The post Life is an Endless Progression of BECOMING. appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

I’ve spent the last 9 months visualizing the life I want to create. The work I want to do. Where I want to do it.

I had it all laid out in my head. Buy a farm in Michigan and create our Eclectic Well-Being Sanctuary. Complete with guest rooms for hosting retreats, space to practice yoga, a wooded area for forest bathing, and a kitchen big enough for Mark to cook and teach others how he creates such tasty yet good for you meals!

You may be reading this and wondering, “Why Michigan?”

I grew up outside Chicago. Michigan was where I spent many summers.  It’s a nature lover’s paradise. The shoreline of Lake Michigan has the most beautiful dunes. The interior countryside has rolling hills with orchards, wineries, and u-pick farms. And the summers are perfect in my opinion, warm enough to lay in the sun on the sand, but cool enough to have a bonfire at night. Plus I would only be a few hours away by car from my mom instead of a few hours away by plane.  Yes, I was ready to move to a place I feel is home.

Making Plans

Once I had this clarity it felt incredible!  But when I shared it with Mark, he was not as receptive as I had hoped.

It took several months and carefully planned out conversations (the most persuasive being held on a mindset retreat no less), before he understood my vision. How it connected to my purpose and how it was possible.  Then, on October 16 last year, he relented and agreed, but only if we did it thoughtfully, not on a whim.

I began making connections on Facebook with like-minded business in Michigan, as well as real estate agents.  Luckily I found one who also owned a yoga studio, which helped her understand my vision.

We researched the best localities, distance to Chicago, and access to Lake Michigan and other places of interest.  We narrowed our search to a fairly large,  but doable, area. I gave her my wishes: minimum of 5 acres, an older home, preferably 2 stories, and with a barn!  A place on-site or nearby for forest bathing. And space for a garden. A pool for aqua yoga would be icing on the cake!

In January we began seriously searching. I made reservations for Mark and me to visit for a weekend and check out some properties as well as get a better feel for the area.

On the weekend we were scheduled to visit, winter storm Kenan hit the East Coast. Our flights were canceled. I flew out a day late as I was also taking my mom home, but there was not enough time to make it to Michigan due to commitments here in New Jersey on Tuesday.

A New Perspective

Taking Mom home opened my eyes.

Upon landing in Chicago one could see the snow for miles. It looked pretty and afterall, it was January.

We drove home where my sister-in-law greeted us.  She  talked about the snow and who was doing their shoveling and how they just got a few more inches on top of what was already there and more was expected.

I had forgotten that in the Midwest, snow rarely melts until spring’s arrival.  Snow accumulates, adding more on top of more.  I begain to recall my childhood winters and the endless snow.

I had to admit, I have grown used to New Jersey, and before that North Carolina, and before that Southern Illinois. Places that get snow, but where it melts in a day or two.  It comes again, but in between, it warms up, before the temps drop again and snow is back.

But in the Michigan, that is not the case.

When I arrived back in New Jersey, I wondered if I really wanted to move. I actually like New Jersey, but I love Michigan. My vision all of a sudden was not clear.

Not a week later, on February 6, a childhood friend posted a video of her dog playing ON the lake at her summer home in Michigan. The lake is completely iced over. Reading through the comments I noticed someone ask, “how thick is that ice?” My friends answer, “about 5-6”. Ice fishing and occasional snowmobiles go by.”

That did it!  That made me realize the huge change I would be making.

Sure, summers would be perfect, but then there is winter. Months of cold. Snow that doesn’t thaw until spring. Nope. Nadda. Can’t do it.

So then why did my vision seem so clear? I had felt so much clarity in the decision that I was now changing.

Our Mind sees what we tell it to see.

David Bayer, our business and mindset coach,  states, “the brain is a goal-achieving machine.” This means that if we give it a goal, it will find a way to make it possible.  When I first started thinking of moving to Michigan, it was summer. I hadn’t seen my mom in 2 years. And I started to feel antsy. After all, I’ve been living in the same house for almost 20 years, longer than anywhere I have ever lived.

I had complete clarity on what I wanted; a sanctuary where people can visit for self-care, relaxatin and life-changing retreats.

So with this goal, and a childhood dream of living in Michigan, my mind began showing me the potential. And there is potential. I still love Michigan. I would still love to host retreats there in the spring, summer, and fall. Just not winter.

See our mind goes wherever we direct it. We make the decision, but the mind shows us all the possibilities. Michigan is a possibility. My mind showed me that Upstate New York also had potential.

Our awareness shows us ALL.

My awareness become focused on these two places and because of that focused awareness, I began noticing the difference in weather. The snow for months at a time. The endless freezing temperatures.  And I noticed that in New Jersey, our winters are calmer. That we get snow, but rarely does it last.

My mind was not telling me to move or not to move to Michigan. No, it was simply showing me, through my conscious awareness, what moving to Michigan would look like. Then it became my decision to continue on that journey, or take a pause.

I decided to take a pause. I decided to research more the potential of Eclectic Well-Being Sanctuary being right here in New Jersey.

And what did my brain show me? A home on 11 acres, very close to where I live now, with plenty of space for everything I want to do. My brain was activated to achieve my goal.

Unfortunately, by the time we called, the property was already under contract. But that’s ok. I now have primed my brain to show me more opportunities. Including the idea of maybe moving to Michigan for 3 seasons and traveling during winter. This idea unfolded after unexpectedly visiting a friend who is doing just that, except her Michigan, is the Poconos.

What now?

I don’t know where this vision will lead. I’m still very clear on what I want. I am clear on my purpose. It’s the how that still needs to come together.  But I know it will.

See, as long as we are clear on our goal. Clear on our vision, we don’t need to know the how. The how will present itself based on the vision we’ve created. Our brain, that goal-achieving machine, will continue to show all the possibilities. It is then in my hands to grab hold of the possibility that resonates most with me. To make the decision and take action.

Changing our minds, our action plan is not a bad thing. It’s allowing ourselves to continuously look at our desires and re-evaluate what is most important. To understand that life is a journey with no destination.

It is the journey that is life.

The post It’s Ok to Change Your Mind appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.