With the same results each time: Lose a little bit of weight on the diet. Get tired of the diet because it’s impossible to maintain for whatever reason. Go back to “normal food” and slowly gain back the weight lost, plus a little bit to add more motivation next year.

It doesn’t really add motivation though, does it? It’s more like adjusting to the new normal and seeing how long it takes before new clothing becomes mandatory because the old clothes are too tight now.

And that’s the whole cycle. Get tired of being too heavy, go on a diet, lose a bit of weight, gain it all back, and try again next year. So many people experience this that there’s even a term for it.

Yo-yo dieting.

So-named because that’s what happens to the weight. It bobs up and down, slowly but steadily climbing a bit higher over the course of the year, until we decide to do something about it, then it drops, and begins to climb all over again.

I suppose we could also have called it “itsy-bitsy spider dieting,” as the spider seems as persistent as that yo-yo.

Regardless of what we call it though, living through it feels demoralizing.

Year after year, sometimes more than once per year, we put ourselves through this. Consistently trying to get onto the other side of the scale, where the numbers go down and stay down.

But they don’t. We watch the mirror in horror as our face swells to the point that we no longer see any family resemblance. We are now the generic “fat person” background character in someone else’s movie.

Why is getting healthy so hard? Why do we have to struggle like this?

Some people can’t take it any longer and resort to drastic medical measures, like having their stomachs stapled so they physically can’t eat as much food. And sometimes that doesn’t work either!

Can you imagine undergoing surgery in an effort to lose weight, and still have it fail?

Now the medical community is even armed with shots to help lose weight. These products are brand-new. Has there been a long-term study on their effects on the body? Will we be watching TV in 2036 and seeing ads for, “If you used MiracleDrug and are now experiencing symptoms of disintegrating liver [or some long list of other possible horrible ailments] YOU MAY BE ENTITLED TO COMPENSATION!” Time will tell.

Why does getting healthy have to be so darned hard?

What if it wasn’t? What if all you needed to do to become the healthy version of yourself is eat and move a bit?

That sounds like fantasy, doesn’t it? Yet for millions of people, it’s reality.

No, there’s no accompanying magic pill to take that makes all of your consumed calories disappear. Likewise, there’s no special food, instant meals, or shake packages. You can literally eat the foods you enjoy, move your body in whatever way you can, and watch the scale go in reverse.

Yes, you do need to move your body. Does that mean hours upon hours of standing-in-place cardio sessions? Nope.

I was skeptical too when I came across this method.

I thought the only way to lose weight and get into shape was to spend a lifetime at the gym, drinking kale smoothies, and eating bland, flavorless “health” food.

Yet I made pork tacos with Spanish Rice for dinner last night, and every Friday night is Pizza Night.

I’m also a chocoholic. I eat chocolate every single day, and I typically end each day with ice cream.

Yet I dropped from 240 down to 168 eating just like this.

Mind you, I didn’t stay at 168 for more than a month or so. People started telling me I was looking “too thin,” so I tweaked my plan a bit and popped up to 183, where I’ve been holding steady since 2020.

So, what do you need to do to make this work for yourself? To answer that, I created a whole year-long immersion program.

During that program, I go over the nine core competencies that everyone must master to live a full and healthy life. None of them are hard, but it’s likely that you’re not doing all nine in the right way at the moment.

I know I sure wasn’t! That’s why, even though I was working out like a madman at the gym, I wasn’t seeing the results I wanted on the scale, or on my body for that matter.

After making these small tweaks, though, everything changed. It really does feel like magic! It took me several decades to pack on all that weight, but once I really got into it, that fat just melted right off in months.

While learning the nine core competencies, I also help my clients to incorporate them into their lives, so that they really start living them and embodying them. After that, I celebrate with them each month as the scale begins to drop, they buy a new outfit in a smaller size, their clothes start to fit how they want them to fit, and they start to admire their own reflection again.

Will it work for you?

Let’s find out! Schedule a call with me to discuss your situation, and if you think it makes sense for us to work together, we will 😊 If not, no worries. I want to work with clients who want my help. Is that you? Click the link below:

Visit: https://www.eclecticwellbeing.com/Mark1-2-1

The post Why is Getting Healthy so Hard? appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

This week something finally clicked in me.  I haven’t been able to make sense of why some people never achieve their dreams. Even with all my mindset training, I still found this lingering doubt if the tools I teach and use, actually work.  If it’s as simple as having clarity, knowing your strengths, and making a powerful decision, shouldn’t more of us be living our dreams?

Well yes and no.

I believe now more than ever that what I teach, what I use in my coaching program really does work.

Because when we don’t achieve our so-called dreams, when we don’t wake up with our desires, it’s because we want the outcome but we don’t want the journey to get there. So yes we more of us could be living our dreams, but many don’t because we are focused on the ego.

Let’s take me for example as a pre-teen.

Going to be a Rock Star

I so wanted to play the guitar. To be in a rock band. Be like Nancy Wilson of Heart!  Have my rock band, sing, and make music!

Heck, in middle school I got our music teacher to let us (I can’t remember who us was – but it was more than just me) “practice” during lunch in the music room!  My memory does not recall who was there with me, but I was going to play bass guitar because I had already tried to learn lead guitar and couldn’t cut it.

Wait, I shouldn’t say I couldn’t cut it, I should say I didn’t choose to cut it.

I didn’t choose to cut my fingernails so they wouldn’t interfere with the frets.

And I didn’t’ choose to practice on a regular basis.

I thought the bass guitar would be easier and the bass guitar could be pretty cool.

But even bass guitar required some dedication. Dedication I didn’t have.

Nope, I wanted to pick up the guitar and be a rock star!  No rehearsing. No learning. Just pick up a guitar and play!

Yep, that was a dream that didn’t come true. And I get it now. I didn’t love or desire the journey to get there!

I didn’t love the idea of practicing daily. The journey I would need to take to become a really good guitar player.

Needless to say, I still dream about playing the guitar around a campfire.  But again, I want to pick it up and play, without the lessons, without the practicing.

Dreams that require work that we don’t want to do, are dreams that will never come true.

Fantasy or Dream?

So how do we tell the difference between Fantasy and Dreams or Desires?

It’s simple. Our desires come from the heart.  They come from a place of love.

Fantasy’s come from a place of ego. A place of coolness, of comparing ourselves to others.

We want that DREAM Home with a 3 car garage, a fireplace, a wrap-around porch, and a Viking Kitchen Stove and Fridge with French Doors, even though we only own one car, we only use the fireplace for the holidays, and we never sit on the porch and the only thing we cook is in the microwave unless again, it’s the holidays.

Is that Dream Home our heart’s desire, or is it our ego that we need to have what is expected we should have?

We want that promotion at work with the dreamy corner office and the prestige of the new title, but we don’t want to work the long hours and play corporate politics to get there.

Too many times we mix up fantasies and dreams. And then when we don’t get it, and others, we don’t understand. What makes them better? Why did they get the corner office? Well, maybe it’s because it was their heart’s desire. Maybe they love the work. Love corporate politics. There is nothing wrong with either of these fantasies being someone’s actual dream.  Just realize, that it may not be yours.

If dreams come from the heart, the journey to get there will also come from the heart, meaning we will love the journey as much as the dream itself.

Choose the Journey  – Not the Destination

There is a Hindu text called the Bhagavad Ghita with writings about the path of self-actualization. It is studied by many during Yoga Teacher Training. There is one phrase from the book that has always captured my interest but now makes so much more sense.

“Set thy heart upon the work, but never on its reward.”

Fall in love with the journey to your dreams, not the dream itself.

Be unattached to the outcome but be content and driven by the journey itself.

Our life is a journey, not a dream. Living our Dream Life is Loving the Journey.

When our desires come from the heart, we love the journey of getting there because, in reality, life is the journey of constantly reaching for our desires.

If we love life, we live in flow. If we live in flow we love the journey, not the destination.

Life is actually not about achieving anything.

Life is about living. Living is working toward our desires.

And when one desire is meant, we move toward the next, enjoying the new road before us.

It is not the destination that will bring us happiness. It is the journey.

The journey of consciously creating a life we love.

The journey of consciously creating ourselves, over and over. As many times as we like.

And loving the journey!

The post Dreams Only Come True When You Love the Journey appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

The Vernal Equinox, the first day of Spring, was once considered the beginning of the new year. It is the start of planting season, signifying renewal, growth, and life.

Farmers are readying the soil and beginning to sow their crops. Birds are nesting and laying eggs for the next generation. Wildlife that has been slow or dormant over the winter emerges looking for food and a new spring home.

Even the name itself, Spring, brings to mind movement, change and regeneration!

No wonder many of us reset our goals, our intentions, and our homes – so many of us participate in “Spring Cleaning!”

Why not spring clean our minds so we can reset, and plant new thoughts?

Clear the Cobwebs

Why is it that one day I notice one cobweb and suddenly they are everywhere!  I can go for months without seeing a one and then all of a sudden the light hits the wall, the ceiling, the window corner, and WOW! A huge cobweb! I wonder how I didn’t see it. And then another appears. And another and I’m spending the day dusting and eliminating them wondering if guests or others who have been to my home noticed them in disgust.

It’s the same with our thoughts.

A cobweb is simply a spider web that is no longer in use, but it collects dust and pollen, and dirt. The cobwebs of our mind are those thoughts that no longer serve us, yet we keep them around. They attract like thoughts and emotions that also don’t serve us, but until we remove them they remain in our minds, collecting negativity.

Spring is the perfect time to dust out those thoughts. Release them along with those attached to them. These are the limiting beliefs that we may have thought we overcame, but are still lingering in the back of our minds.

Dust out those lingering thoughts by first acknowledging they are still there. For example, this past week during our coaching call with our coach (yes, coaches have coaches – we need support too!) Mark realized that the block he was having was the same limiting belief he thought he had cleared out long ago. But here it was, resurfacing when the light hit it just right.  Just like cobwebs.

Let Go of Limiting Beliefs

It’s important to recognize that many of our limiting beliefs are so ingrained in our minds the cobwebs remain hidden until there is a light that brings them out of the darkness. That’s why when we notice them, we clean them out.

It’s all about the practice we call, the Power of Decision. It’s something I teach all my Total MindShift clients and speak about in different talks. Mark talks also teaches it in his Well-Being 101 Call.

Beliefs are simply decisions our mind accepts as pure fact. And when we find some limiting beliefs, those cobwebs that are collecting dust, we simply need to make a new decision and clean out those cobwebs!

Plant Seeds of Intention

If we want to grow a life of abundance, we must plant those seeds.  And we must have complete clarity on what we want to grow.

If we want beans, we don’t plant seeds from a butternut squash!  If we want violets to grow, we don’t plant daisies.

It’s the same with our dreams and desires. We must plant the intention, but we must have complete clarity on what we want to grow.

Spring is the ideal time to look at the life you are creating and decide if this is still what you want. We change. We grow. Our dreams and desires will evolve. Allow yourself to let go of dreams and plant seeds for new ones.

Create intentions for where you are today. Be absolutely clear on what it is you want. Then plant the seed with a clear vision of what will sprout.

Nurture Your Garden

As spring turns to summer, it is important to nurture our dreams, just as we nurture a garden of flowers or vegetables. Watering them when they need a drink, clearing out the weeds, just like clearing out the cobwebs.

Our dreams can have difficulty becoming reality when we don’t take the time to nurture them. We need to support them with action. This could be taking a class to learn more about what we want. Hiring a coach to help keep us accountable. Talking with others who can help us. If we do something every day that is aligned with our desires, we are walking the path and it will lead us to our dreams.

So get to that Spring Cleaning of your Mind. Clean out the cobwebs and dust. Replace it with new empowering beliefs. Then plant a spring garden of intentions. With a bit of nurturing, our seeds will grow into our desires. Consciously creating a life we love!

The post Spring Reset appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

I’ve spent the last 9 months visualizing the life I want to create. The work I want to do. Where I want to do it.

I had it all laid out in my head. Buy a farm in Michigan and create our Eclectic Well-Being Sanctuary. Complete with guest rooms for hosting retreats, space to practice yoga, a wooded area for forest bathing, and a kitchen big enough for Mark to cook and teach others how he creates such tasty yet good for you meals!

You may be reading this and wondering, “Why Michigan?”

I grew up outside Chicago. Michigan was where I spent many summers.  It’s a nature lover’s paradise. The shoreline of Lake Michigan has the most beautiful dunes. The interior countryside has rolling hills with orchards, wineries, and u-pick farms. And the summers are perfect in my opinion, warm enough to lay in the sun on the sand, but cool enough to have a bonfire at night. Plus I would only be a few hours away by car from my mom instead of a few hours away by plane.  Yes, I was ready to move to a place I feel is home.

Making Plans

Once I had this clarity it felt incredible!  But when I shared it with Mark, he was not as receptive as I had hoped.

It took several months and carefully planned out conversations (the most persuasive being held on a mindset retreat no less), before he understood my vision. How it connected to my purpose and how it was possible.  Then, on October 16 last year, he relented and agreed, but only if we did it thoughtfully, not on a whim.

I began making connections on Facebook with like-minded business in Michigan, as well as real estate agents.  Luckily I found one who also owned a yoga studio, which helped her understand my vision.

We researched the best localities, distance to Chicago, and access to Lake Michigan and other places of interest.  We narrowed our search to a fairly large,  but doable, area. I gave her my wishes: minimum of 5 acres, an older home, preferably 2 stories, and with a barn!  A place on-site or nearby for forest bathing. And space for a garden. A pool for aqua yoga would be icing on the cake!

In January we began seriously searching. I made reservations for Mark and me to visit for a weekend and check out some properties as well as get a better feel for the area.

On the weekend we were scheduled to visit, winter storm Kenan hit the East Coast. Our flights were canceled. I flew out a day late as I was also taking my mom home, but there was not enough time to make it to Michigan due to commitments here in New Jersey on Tuesday.

A New Perspective

Taking Mom home opened my eyes.

Upon landing in Chicago one could see the snow for miles. It looked pretty and afterall, it was January.

We drove home where my sister-in-law greeted us.  She  talked about the snow and who was doing their shoveling and how they just got a few more inches on top of what was already there and more was expected.

I had forgotten that in the Midwest, snow rarely melts until spring’s arrival.  Snow accumulates, adding more on top of more.  I begain to recall my childhood winters and the endless snow.

I had to admit, I have grown used to New Jersey, and before that North Carolina, and before that Southern Illinois. Places that get snow, but where it melts in a day or two.  It comes again, but in between, it warms up, before the temps drop again and snow is back.

But in the Michigan, that is not the case.

When I arrived back in New Jersey, I wondered if I really wanted to move. I actually like New Jersey, but I love Michigan. My vision all of a sudden was not clear.

Not a week later, on February 6, a childhood friend posted a video of her dog playing ON the lake at her summer home in Michigan. The lake is completely iced over. Reading through the comments I noticed someone ask, “how thick is that ice?” My friends answer, “about 5-6”. Ice fishing and occasional snowmobiles go by.”

That did it!  That made me realize the huge change I would be making.

Sure, summers would be perfect, but then there is winter. Months of cold. Snow that doesn’t thaw until spring. Nope. Nadda. Can’t do it.

So then why did my vision seem so clear? I had felt so much clarity in the decision that I was now changing.

Our Mind sees what we tell it to see.

David Bayer, our business and mindset coach,  states, “the brain is a goal-achieving machine.” This means that if we give it a goal, it will find a way to make it possible.  When I first started thinking of moving to Michigan, it was summer. I hadn’t seen my mom in 2 years. And I started to feel antsy. After all, I’ve been living in the same house for almost 20 years, longer than anywhere I have ever lived.

I had complete clarity on what I wanted; a sanctuary where people can visit for self-care, relaxatin and life-changing retreats.

So with this goal, and a childhood dream of living in Michigan, my mind began showing me the potential. And there is potential. I still love Michigan. I would still love to host retreats there in the spring, summer, and fall. Just not winter.

See our mind goes wherever we direct it. We make the decision, but the mind shows us all the possibilities. Michigan is a possibility. My mind showed me that Upstate New York also had potential.

Our awareness shows us ALL.

My awareness become focused on these two places and because of that focused awareness, I began noticing the difference in weather. The snow for months at a time. The endless freezing temperatures.  And I noticed that in New Jersey, our winters are calmer. That we get snow, but rarely does it last.

My mind was not telling me to move or not to move to Michigan. No, it was simply showing me, through my conscious awareness, what moving to Michigan would look like. Then it became my decision to continue on that journey, or take a pause.

I decided to take a pause. I decided to research more the potential of Eclectic Well-Being Sanctuary being right here in New Jersey.

And what did my brain show me? A home on 11 acres, very close to where I live now, with plenty of space for everything I want to do. My brain was activated to achieve my goal.

Unfortunately, by the time we called, the property was already under contract. But that’s ok. I now have primed my brain to show me more opportunities. Including the idea of maybe moving to Michigan for 3 seasons and traveling during winter. This idea unfolded after unexpectedly visiting a friend who is doing just that, except her Michigan, is the Poconos.

What now?

I don’t know where this vision will lead. I’m still very clear on what I want. I am clear on my purpose. It’s the how that still needs to come together.  But I know it will.

See, as long as we are clear on our goal. Clear on our vision, we don’t need to know the how. The how will present itself based on the vision we’ve created. Our brain, that goal-achieving machine, will continue to show all the possibilities. It is then in my hands to grab hold of the possibility that resonates most with me. To make the decision and take action.

Changing our minds, our action plan is not a bad thing. It’s allowing ourselves to continuously look at our desires and re-evaluate what is most important. To understand that life is a journey with no destination.

It is the journey that is life.

The post It’s Ok to Change Your Mind appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

There was a time in my life I couldn’t let things go.

When something was wrong, I had to fix it. At all costs.

In an argument, I didn’t stop until I won or they walked away.

If I was angry, that anger lasted. A. Very. Long. Time.

I’m not sure why I could never let things go. Forgiving was almost impossible.

But today. I’m happy to say, I’ve found peace in accepting. In realizing that my opinions, my beliefs, no matter how valid, are mine. And others have theirs.

It’s taken some conscious work and it didn’t happen overnight. In fact, I still go back to my past ways occasionally, but they don’t last nearly as long.

During this week between Christmas and New Year’s, we naturally go into reflection. Whether you are at work or home taking time off, the days are slower. Perhaps they are filled with family or friends you haven’t seen in a while.  Or maybe this year you’re staying closer to home, isolating again. Wherever you are, let it go.

Let go of what hurts.

Those past grievances. The heartbreak from the past. The disappointment you’ve experienced.  We all have been hurt by those we love. Those we’ve trusted. People we thought of as friends can break our spirit.  But hanging onto that hurt only hurts ourselves. Whether they hurt us intentionally or unintentionally, let it go. Forgiveness can be difficult. But not forgiving hardens our own hearts.

When you hold onto feelings of betrayal and disgust, that negativity transcends into other parts of your life. You may find that anger coming up with those who had nothing to do with the hurt you are feeling. But the hurtfulness likes company so many times we in turn hurt others.  We may want to take revenge on those who have hurt us. But when we do that, we are operating from our primal state, aren’t we? We are fighting for survival, yet our lives are not in danger. And we know operating from a primal state only benefits us when we are in mortal danger.  Emotional hurts are best dealt with in a powerful state. Consciously choosing to let go. To acknowledge and release those feelings rather than allowing them to permeate into the depths of our soul.

Let go of “Fixing.”

This may be the hardest thing to do when it’s those we love, especially when it happens to be our children.

When our kids are young, we fix their scrapes and bruises. We help fix their physical body.  But we Never can fix their emotional scars. No matter how hard we try. No matter what we do. We can’t fix that. It may make us feel better and make our son or daughter seem better for a short while, but their emotional wounds are theirs to heal. All we can do is be there for them. To love them unconditionally.

Shortly after I wrote the words above, I was tested once again with wanting to make it all alright.  Christmas Eve and things were not alright. Yet I realized there was nothing I could do except say “I love you. I am here for you. I am not going anywhere.” I couldn’t make another’s hurt stop, but I could love them. I could be there.

Perhaps the next time you want to do something to make someone else stop hurting, STOP and just love them. Ask them what you can do to help. It’s hard to hear the words “Nothing, you can’t do anything.” But that is their truth. Listen and just be there. Letting go of your own need to fix.

Let go of perfection or wanting to be liked.

No one is perfect. Not everyone will like us. And even those that like us may not like every single thing about us. And guess what? That’s Ok.

I thought I let this one go a while back, but I realized that although I’m accepting of others. I’m accepting of my house not being cleaned just so or presents not being wrapped with the prettiest of bows, I didn’t quite accept that others may be irritated by some of my acceptance, my lack of detail. I was yet to accept that not everyone sees the world through my lens of life, my filter of my experiences.

Nope. Just because I like my healthier version of chicken divan these days, doesn’t mean my kids, who grew up eating the Campbell’s Cream of Chicken Soup version, would think it to be just as delicious. Or that when I’m called out for my lack of wrapping skills, or my lack of expertise in hand-washing dishes, it’s ok. It’s not being mean or loving me any less. Heck, it’s the truth about me. Why should I be offended? Let it go.

Letting go is surrendering.

It’s having hope and faith. It’s believing that we are perfectly imperfect and so is everyone else.

Letting go is a conscious practice. It is one where we are mindful of our feelings, our current state of being, and then we let it go like a sigh out the mouth.

In these last days of 2021 and as we approach a new year, let go of whatever is holding you back. Anything that is not helping you live your best life. Helping you Be your best Self!

Practice letting go, by surrendering to be who you are while accepting others just as they are.

Surrender to Being. Look at nature for inspiration and understanding. The flower, the tree, the bird, all let it go. They surrender to what the day brings. They do not worry about tomorrow.

And they do not sulk about yesterday. They are ever-present in the moment. It is how we are when we are truly living. When we are being, not just doing and achieving.

I like to choose a word for the year. A word that will inspire me.

Since I noticed I still have work to do on letting go, I’ve chosen Surrender for my word for 2022.

Surrender to being who I am. Surrender to whatever the universe brings to me. I will surrender to whatever happens, letting go of attachment and expectations.

Will you join me in Letting Go? Will you join in learning to Just Be?

In the words of Elsa,

“It’s funny how some distance makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me can’t get to me at all
It’s time to see what I can do
To test the limits and break through”

Let it Go.

The post Learning to be Elsa….. appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

Last week I discussed Step 1 which is understanding your spiritual vision, your values, and your WHY! Understanding your purpose and how it relates to the world is the foundation. When we are clear on this, we can easily process everything through this lens. Is it aligned with my spiritual vision, my values and my why?

Step 2 is then finding clarity around the life you want to live. It’s important to be able to visualize it completely and fully.

It’s not about what we DON’T Want

Many times we know exactly what we don’t want. When I worked for Nautica in NYC, I knew I didn’t want to commute an hour and half one way. I knew I didn’t really want to be focused on selling more clothing that most of us really don’t need. I knew I didn’t want to be on call after hours and on weekends. So I would complain and moan about these aspects of my job, but I absolutely had no clarity on what I really wanted.

In 2016 Mark and I bought a yoga studio. By this time I knew I wanted to own my own business and I wanted to improve people’s lives. Did I have clarity that I wanted a yoga studio? Did I have clarity that I wanted not to just own a yoga studio, but that I wanted to be part of a chain of yoga studios?

No I did not. I just knew it was the first step in getting me out of what I didn’t want.

So a year later, in May of 2017, I went into panic.

I had been working my way out of a job by refusing to lay-off my staff and instead offer a plan where I would be the one let go. You may think I was crazy, and perhaps I was; but I knew it was time for me to leave. But I didn’t have the courage in me to just resign and move on.

For one, I had no idea what I did want to do. We had the studio, but I felt like a failure teaching (I was living the paradox of “I’m not good enough.”), and I didn’t feel confident in the whole business. I knew subconsciously that to leave my good-paying, executive job, it was going to have to be from Nautica letting me go. And finally they did!

At first I was thrilled! Excited! Elated! But that quickly wore off once I thought, “what am I going to do now?” I had no plan. The studio didn’t seem like the answer, it was barely breaking even and at that time I didn’t believe it ever would be successful. (I now know this was a deeply-rooted limiting belief – but that’s for another day).

So, for the next year I stumbled through life.

I worried that we would run out of money. I tried my hand at a number of things, like flipping a house that had been vacant for 10+ years and finally landing on coaching. How I got there took many twists and turns.

But I started to go inward, doing some personal development work, going to Tony Robbins Events and I realized what I have always done, no matter my job or volunteer role, was to help others see the best in themselves! It was the main reason I had previously gone back to school for my MBA – so I could be an adjunct professor and work with college students. It’s why at my time in the corporate world I enjoyed writing and giving reviews and midyear updates to my staff! I wanted to see them thrive and I wanted to support them.

Knowing what you love doing is KEY

Once I understood this, I started to gain clarity on the life I wanted to create. I began to have confidence, not just in me, but the yoga studio, in Mark and in the life we were creating.

So in Summer of 2018 I went on a personal solo retreat to the Pocono’s and started creating my life. My first coaching business was created:  Far Cliffs, from Jonathan Livingston Seagull. I decided to create a program that would focus on an individual’s inherent strengths, not skills but character. My work would be helping others find the best inside of them and bring it to the world! I finally had some clarity.

Clarity leads to more clarity.

The thing is, once you notice the change with clarity, you start getting a clearer and clearer picture. By 2019 Mark and I had done some amazing work and we were clear that we wanted to help others. We loved the yoga studio and the community we created, but being part of a franchise made it difficult to do the things we wanted to do. We started to plan our exit: make 2020 the most profitable year yet, making it desirable for someone who wanted to be part of a franchise to buy it so we could go on our own and help others through our coaching!

Well you know what happened in 2020. Covid. We not only had to close our doors, but we also couldn’t find anyone to buy the studio. No one wanted to take that risk at that point in time. Our franchise agreement was ending as well as our lease on the space and we needed to make a decision.

“Should I stay or should I go?” The Clash

The easy decision would have been to stay. We had enough money from Covid loans to keep going at least another 9 months to a year, but that would mean signing on for at least another 2 years, time to get it back to profitable and then time to sell.

We were clear, we didn’t want to be part of the franchise. We wanted to create something of our own. Help people in more ways than just through Yoga. So even with complete understanding that if we didn’t renew our lease and franchise agreement, we would have to close the doors for good and file bankruptcy, that is exactly what we did.

Clarity keeps you living your spiritual vision, your values.

The decision aligned with our values. The decision aligned with the clarity of the life we wanted to create. It was difficult and we were unsure how we would get through; but see, when you have clarity, you don’t settle. You see your future and you don’t take detours or roads that take you away from them, not closer.

So in 2021, Far Cliffs became Eclectic Well-being and we were truly creating a life we love!

When we take the detour, a path not aligned with our values, we Survive, not Thrive.

If it wasn’t for being absolutely clear of what we wanted, we most likely would have resigned to right now  running a franchised yoga studio. We would be surviving, not thriving. So many of us do things to survive because we don’t have a clear vision of what it means to us to be thriving.

If you don’t have a clear vision of what you want your life to be, you will never get to thriving or living in flow. You will simply continue to survive.

Look inside. Think about what kind of life you really want. Do you want to work with others? Do you prefer more alone time? What impact do you want to have? Is your job a means to create your life, or is your job your life and the way to fulfilling your spiritual vision such as in our case?

There are no right or wrong answers here. It is simply taking fine tuning our lenses until we have a sharp crisp image of the life we want.

Next week the final step in Creating a Life You Love… The Power of Decision.

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