With the same results each time: Lose a little bit of weight on the diet. Get tired of the diet because it’s impossible to maintain for whatever reason. Go back to “normal food” and slowly gain back the weight lost, plus a little bit to add more motivation next year.

It doesn’t really add motivation though, does it? It’s more like adjusting to the new normal and seeing how long it takes before new clothing becomes mandatory because the old clothes are too tight now.

And that’s the whole cycle. Get tired of being too heavy, go on a diet, lose a bit of weight, gain it all back, and try again next year. So many people experience this that there’s even a term for it.

Yo-yo dieting.

So-named because that’s what happens to the weight. It bobs up and down, slowly but steadily climbing a bit higher over the course of the year, until we decide to do something about it, then it drops, and begins to climb all over again.

I suppose we could also have called it “itsy-bitsy spider dieting,” as the spider seems as persistent as that yo-yo.

Regardless of what we call it though, living through it feels demoralizing.

Year after year, sometimes more than once per year, we put ourselves through this. Consistently trying to get onto the other side of the scale, where the numbers go down and stay down.

But they don’t. We watch the mirror in horror as our face swells to the point that we no longer see any family resemblance. We are now the generic “fat person” background character in someone else’s movie.

Why is getting healthy so hard? Why do we have to struggle like this?

Some people can’t take it any longer and resort to drastic medical measures, like having their stomachs stapled so they physically can’t eat as much food. And sometimes that doesn’t work either!

Can you imagine undergoing surgery in an effort to lose weight, and still have it fail?

Now the medical community is even armed with shots to help lose weight. These products are brand-new. Has there been a long-term study on their effects on the body? Will we be watching TV in 2036 and seeing ads for, “If you used MiracleDrug and are now experiencing symptoms of disintegrating liver [or some long list of other possible horrible ailments] YOU MAY BE ENTITLED TO COMPENSATION!” Time will tell.

Why does getting healthy have to be so darned hard?

What if it wasn’t? What if all you needed to do to become the healthy version of yourself is eat and move a bit?

That sounds like fantasy, doesn’t it? Yet for millions of people, it’s reality.

No, there’s no accompanying magic pill to take that makes all of your consumed calories disappear. Likewise, there’s no special food, instant meals, or shake packages. You can literally eat the foods you enjoy, move your body in whatever way you can, and watch the scale go in reverse.

Yes, you do need to move your body. Does that mean hours upon hours of standing-in-place cardio sessions? Nope.

I was skeptical too when I came across this method.

I thought the only way to lose weight and get into shape was to spend a lifetime at the gym, drinking kale smoothies, and eating bland, flavorless “health” food.

Yet I made pork tacos with Spanish Rice for dinner last night, and every Friday night is Pizza Night.

I’m also a chocoholic. I eat chocolate every single day, and I typically end each day with ice cream.

Yet I dropped from 240 down to 168 eating just like this.

Mind you, I didn’t stay at 168 for more than a month or so. People started telling me I was looking “too thin,” so I tweaked my plan a bit and popped up to 183, where I’ve been holding steady since 2020.

So, what do you need to do to make this work for yourself? To answer that, I created a whole year-long immersion program.

During that program, I go over the nine core competencies that everyone must master to live a full and healthy life. None of them are hard, but it’s likely that you’re not doing all nine in the right way at the moment.

I know I sure wasn’t! That’s why, even though I was working out like a madman at the gym, I wasn’t seeing the results I wanted on the scale, or on my body for that matter.

After making these small tweaks, though, everything changed. It really does feel like magic! It took me several decades to pack on all that weight, but once I really got into it, that fat just melted right off in months.

While learning the nine core competencies, I also help my clients to incorporate them into their lives, so that they really start living them and embodying them. After that, I celebrate with them each month as the scale begins to drop, they buy a new outfit in a smaller size, their clothes start to fit how they want them to fit, and they start to admire their own reflection again.

Will it work for you?

Let’s find out! Schedule a call with me to discuss your situation, and if you think it makes sense for us to work together, we will 😊 If not, no worries. I want to work with clients who want my help. Is that you? Click the link below:

Visit: https://www.eclecticwellbeing.com/Mark1-2-1

The post Why is Getting Healthy so Hard? appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

Last week, one of our favorite networking events graced us with its presence once again. This particular monthly meet-up always fills us with joy and excitement. It’s casual, fun and we’ve come to know many of the other business owners.

As the evening unfolded, warmth permeated the air, mingling with the lively chatter and the melodious clinking of glasses. While I navigated through familiar faces and introduced myself to new faces, Mark found himself engrossed in conversation with a retired counselor. I recall sharing with him earlier in the evening the essence of what I do—helping individuals navigate life’s twists and turns, empowering them to embrace change and create a life they love. Later at home, Mark relayed to me, that amidst their conversation, the question emerged:

“What qualifies Kathi to provide counseling?”

As Mark recounted this exchange to me, we both found it disconcerting. How could someone ingrained in the realm of assisting others, still harbor misconceptions about our role as coaches? This question was a poignant reminder of the gap that often exists between the perceptions of coaching and counseling. So, let’s embark into the heart of coaching, and explore the facets that set it apart from counseling.

At its core, coaching is about propelling you forward. Igniting the fires of progress. And nurturing personal growth. Whereas, counseling often delves into past traumas and mental health diagnoses. In contrast, coaching is forward-focused. It’s about harnessing the power of the present moment to craft a brighter future.

As seasoned coaches, our mission is clear—to guide you toward clarity, purpose, and resilience amidst life’s challenges. We delve into your current mindset, thoughts, and emotions. And we ask probing questions that pave the way for self-discovery and empowerment. Through this process, you’re not just a passive participant. In contrast, you’re an active architect of your destiny. Equipped with the tools to navigate life’s complexities with confidence and grace.

Here’s where the magic of coaching truly comes alive.

Empowerment Through Self-Discovery

Coaching is a collaborative voyage of self-exploration and empowerment. It’s akin to setting sail on an exhilarating journey of self-discovery. A quest to unearth the treasure trove of your unique strengths, talents, and virtues. Through tools such as the VIA Character Strengths assessment, we shine a spotlight on the jewels within you. Illuminating the facets of your character that make you truly extraordinary.

As we navigate the vast expanse of your inner landscape, we clarify your aspirations. The threads of your dreams are untangled. We chart a course toward the horizon of your aspirations.

Imagine yourself adrift in a sea of uncertainty. Enveloped by the dense fog of indecision and ambiguity. Coaching serves as the guiding beacon that pierces through the mist. Casting light upon the hidden contours of your path. With newfound clarity, you’re no longer at the mercy of the turbulent tides. Instead, you stand poised at the helm, empowered to steer your ship toward the shores of your destiny.

As we navigate the seas of uncertainty, gone are the days of feeling adrift or directionless. We continue onward, harnessing the winds of change to propel you toward the shores of your dreams. With each step forward, you’re not merely chasing after your aspirations—you’re embodying them. Breathing life into your boldest visions, and sculpting a reality that mirrors the brilliance of your soul.

Mindset Mastery

The power of mindset is not just influential; it’s foundational. Mindset forms the bedrock upon which your reality is built. Every desire, aspiration, and every dream you harbor, they are all intricately intertwined with the landscape of your mindset.

As staunch advocates of its transformative potential, we recognize that mindset isn’t just a facet of your journey. It’s the very essence of it. Together, we embark on a profound exploration of the terrain of your thoughts and beliefs. This leads us to challenging the barriers of limiting beliefs, cultivating resilience, and nurturing a mindset of abundance and possibility.

With the right mindset, every goal becomes attainable. Every dream is within reach. Whether you’re striving to shed a few pounds, launch your own business, or embark on a meaningful and purposeful retirement, (I like to call this stage of life “inspirement”), mindset is the linchpin that propels you toward success.

One of our own coaches taught us, “The brain is a goal-achieving machine.” Napoleon Hill, author of the infamous book, Think and Grow Rich, said it another way, “Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” Without a doubt, when you harness the mind’s formidable powers, the possibilities are limitless.

Tailored Support

Your journey through life is as unique as your fingerprint. Just as no two snowflakes are alike, no two paths toward fulfillment are identical. For the same reason, our coaching approach is not a one-size-fits-all solution. It’s a bespoke tapestry woven to reflect your individual needs, desires, and aspirations. Like skilled artisans, we carefully craft each session to align with your personal journey, ensuring that every step you take is a deliberate stride toward your chosen destination.

As coaches, Mark and I are simply guides on this odyssey of self-discovery and growth. Think of us as the compass that points you in the direction of your dreams. The map that charts the course of your aspirations. But here’s the beauty of it all—you are the captain of your ship. Indeed, you are the master of your destiny. We’re only here to empower you to steer the helm. To navigate the waters of change with confidence and clarity.

Our role as coaches is not to dictate your path or impose our agenda upon you. Instead, we provide you with a toolbox filled with an array of potent instruments. Tools for self-reflection. Other tools for goal-setting. And still other tools for mindset mastery. It’s up to you how you wield these tools. How you integrate them into the fabric of your life. We honor your autonomy, your agency, your sovereignty over your own destiny.

Holistic Well-Being

When it comes to well-being, the conventional approach often focuses solely on the physical body—diet, exercise, and medical check-ups. But, while these aspects are undoubtedly important, true holistic well-being extends far beyond. It encompasses the intricate interplay of mind, body, and spirit. Holistic Well-Being is undeniably a delicate dance of harmony and balance that reverberates throughout every facet of our lives.

This holistic perspective is where coaching shines brightest, setting it apart from traditional counseling or therapy. Whereas counseling may primarily address mental or emotional challenges, and therapy may delve into the depths of past traumas, coaching takes a broader view. Coaching encompasses the entirety of your being. In fact, our role is not to mend broken wings or soothe wounded souls. It’s to uplift, inspire, and empower you to soar to new heights of well-being and fulfillment.

Thus, our coaching philosophy is grounded in this holistic approach. Recognizing that true well-being arises from alignment and synergy across mind, body, spirit, and beyond. Imagine these facets of your being as the interlocking gears of a finely-tuned machine. Each gear essential to the smooth functioning of the whole. When one gear falls out of sync, it can throw the entire system into disarray. Similarly, when one aspect of your well-being is neglected or unbalanced, it can have ripple effects that reverberate throughout your life.

That’s why our coaching process is designed to address each of these interconnected areas with equal care and attention. We work with you to cultivate  clarity and emotional resilience. To nourish your body with wholesome nutrition and invigorating movement. And to nurture your spirit with practices that resonate with your soul’s deepest yearnings. By fostering alignment and synergy in these areas, we lay the foundation for a life of profound meaning and purpose.

Everyone Needs a Coach

Finally, as we reflect on the essence of coaching and its transformative power, it’s essential to revisit the distinction between coaching and counseling. While counseling delves into past traumas and therapy may focus on mental health diagnoses, coaching takes a proactive, forward-looking approach. Unquestionably, coaching empowers you to consciously create the life you love.

Consider this: athletes have coaches to refine their skills and optimize performance. Singers have coaches to hone their talents and amplify their voices. Similarly, coaching provides the accountability, guidance, and support you need to navigate life’s twists and turns with clarity and confidence. Coaching offers a beacon of light in the midst of uncertainty. Furthermore, it keeps you focused on your goals. It empowers you to overcome obstacles, and celebrates your victories along the way.

So, as you embark on your journey toward holistic well-being and personal growth, remember, coaching is not just for the elite few. On the contrary, it’s for every single person who dares to dream. Every person who aspires and embraces change. Undeniably, coaching is the compass that guides you toward your North Star. The catalyst that propels you toward your fullest potential.

If you’re ready to unlock the extraordinary within you, I invite you to take the first step. Schedule a Breakthrough Call today, and let’s embark on this extraordinary journey together. Your best life awaits—let’s make it happen.

The post From Dreams to Reality: Why Coaching Is Essential for Creating a Life You Love appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

Every year I choose a word to help me make some lasting changes in my life. In 2020 the word was Zest. Zest is one of 24 Character Strengths. Defined as approaching life feeling activated and enthusiastic. Imagine that has my focus for 2020! (you have to admit the Universe knew what it was doing) It was one of my lesser strengths on my VIA Character Strength Profile. I wanted this strength to become one of my more used strengths so I intentionally made it my word for the year. And guess what? It actually moved up the scale.

Last year my word was Trust. We had filed bankruptcy on our business rather than stay connected to a franchise we no longer felt aligned with. Eclectic Well-Being was created and trusting things would all work out was at the core of moving forward. I had to trust in myself. Trust in Mark. And Trust in the process.

Trust also allowed me to let go of trying to fix things for others, particularly those closest to me. If I loved them and believed in them, I had to trust them instead of fixing them. It has changed the way I look at so many things.

This year my word is Surrender, which is similar to trust, but it’s more than trusting. It’s adding on giving up control. It’s trusting, but instead of worrying, thinking about it, or constantly taking action upon action, (my favorite way to maintain trust) it’s letting go and truly believing that whatever happens, it is part of a divine plan.

What is Surrender?

Dictionary.com defines surrender as “to yield (something) to the possession or power of another; deliver up possession of on demand or under duress.” It also defines it as, “to give (oneself) up to some influence, course, emotion, etc.”

My definition is a bit of both. I see surrender as yielding control to the Universe, but not under duress, I am giving my control willing.

It’s been tough for me embodying this word, surrender. Yielding control is not easy for me. Surrender is so much more than trust. I must admit, I have not been embracing the word as much as I could be.

My Futile Attempts to Surrender

Last month we journeyed to Cabo San Lucas for a Business Retreat. It was part of the coaching program we belong to and it’s been 3 years since we were together in person for this event. I must admit, I wasn’t excited. I had so much to do. Properties to see. Did I really need to be gone for 5 days?

But we went. I intentionally booked later morning flights as I am getting to old to get up in the middle of the night to catch a 6 a.m. flight. But that later flight meant we had a tighter connection. And low and behold, our flight was late. A good 30 minutes behind departure and with less than an hour layover, I surrendered to the fact we were not going to make our connection. But letting go of control? Nope. There I was on my phone, seeing when the next flight from DFW to Cabo departed. Taking action, again, instead of simply surrendering.

There was a later flight, about 4 hours later, but at least we would still get there the same day. Ok, now I could surrender.

However, the Universe was not only able to get us to DFW on time, and with no difficulty, at all, we actually made our original connection. Wow! How did that happen?

I didn’t make it happen. I had no control over the situation. Yet, our trip progressed exactly as it was meant to and my action in figuring out when the next flight we could possible take was futile.

12 steps

So here we are in Cabo, and I’m starting to actually enjoy and feel excited and engaged in the setting, the people, and the discussions. I’m learning and noticing what we could utilize in growing our business. And then, a topic never presented before comes up, the 12-step program.

Wait, I’m at a business retreat, not an addiction recovery retreat. How does this relate to my business?

Intrigued with this subject, I listen inently. I know about the 12 steps, but I have no idea what the 12 steps are except, don’t they revolve around surrendering? We’re given an exercise  to identify our greatest accomplishment and the things we’re most grateful for. Then work backward, identifying all the things that had to happen in order for that to happen. Notice then, how much of that was not in our control.

I work the process, the exercise. I utilized a couple of different things and all came back to a situation or event that I had no control over. And if I take that back even further, I get to me being born, which again, I had no control over.

But What About Free Will

I leave the session feeling a bit confused and also I admit, defeated. If I have no control, and that the Universe (God if you prefer), is fully in control, what is my purpose? Don’t I have “free-will?” Don’t the choices I make do anything?

I was filled with questions. A part of me felt really good. Letting go of control means you also let go of failures. Accepting that was is happening is exactly what is supposed to be happening.

Yet, if I’m here for a reason, I have a purpose to serve, then don’t I have some control? Oh how my mind was moving in numerous directions.

Now you may be wondering why the 12-step program was even brought up at a business retreat. Well 12 steps are about addiction and the way we think, and our thought patterns can also be an addiction. We can be addicted to worry. To overthinking. To negative self-talk.  That made complete sense to me and I was intrigued as to how to apply this new learning to Eclectic and all my dreams for a sanctuary.

However, I was struggling with this idea as well. The conflict in my mind of Surrendering and Free Will.

Getting to the Root of It

The next day we started like usual with David, the leader of the retreat, taking questions from the floor. I raised my hand. Not even sure what my question was, but I knew I needed more discussion on the previous day’s topic, surrender.  I don’t raise my had often and many times by the time I do, David has already determined who to call on. But this time, my hand was up and just like that, I was asking David for his opinion or thoughts on if the Universe is in control and I if need to just surrender, where is my free-will? How can both be true? What about all the talk of making powerful decisions – David’s Key Phrase.

When you ask David a question, he does not just answer it. He asks questions right back at you, allowing you to process and eventually answer the question yourself. It’s what coaches do and what I try to do for my clients. I knew that was going to be the scenario, but it’s difficult to ask yourself the right questions. That’s why even though Mark and I are coaches, we also have a coach.

I don’t remember what he asked me, but we went back and forth for quite a while. We talked about how Mark surrenders more easily. What am I addicted to, which it wasn’t until this discussion that I realized it’s control. I shared that surrender is my word for this year and how this seemed so serendipitous. But I wasn’t quite understanding still, even with all this discussion.

And then it hit me.

Like a rock. I’m not sure if he said something or it just clicked in my brain. But I realized I had recently learned to surrender in my relationships. Trusting others to make the right decisions, yet, still being there for them. Still supporting them and taking action. But I surrender to the outcome, knowing I don’t have control of their lives. I am no longer tied to the outcome, but I am still invested in their well-being.

This is what is missing in my business. I still need that control. I need to feel that if I do something different, something more, I can get the outcome I want. In reality, I simply need to decide what it is I want to accomplish, what I want to do, and DO IT. Doing is still critical, as nothing will happen without action. Then after taking the action, I must let go of controlling the outcome. I must surrender. Trust first, but then completely let go of that control. Surrender to the fact that a higher power will either show me this is the right path, or guess what, maybe there is another.

Letting go of control does not mean not taking action. Not moving toward our desires. It’s the acceptance that once we make a decision, once we take action, we surrender that the outcome is out of our hands. We accept whatever comes from the decisions we make and we learn from it, or redirect ourselves to another path. But no matter the outcome, there are no failures. And we are not in control.

Still Processing

I’m still processing all of this as it’s difficult to surrender control. To let go of the belief that I have all the power.

Whether it’s business, relationships, or our own emotions, surrendering to a power greater than ourselves, actually releases us from the thought that we fail or we succeed. We don’t do either. We keep moving forward, working in unison with the energy around us, with the greater plan that we are only a small part of.

But what we bring to the greater plan is something only we can bring. Only we can do. We are all here for a reason. We all have a role in the greater plan.

I’m focused even more so now on surrendering. Releasing the idea that I have control. Accepting that I am a significant part of a greater plan, but that I do not control that plan.

If you are addicted to control like me, try doing the exercise I mentioned above. Notice how it all comes back to events where you were not in control.

And if you want to practice surrender, come  play with me this month! Sign up for Explore Laugh Play! A 30 Day Challenge to let go of stress which includes letting go of control and surrendering each day!

The post Surrender appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

Teaching Aqua Yoga I have had a number of students comment about the temperature of the water. Usually that it’s too cold and it can’t be the stated temperature of 84 degrees. Even in St Croix, a number of guests felt the water to be cold and wanted to ensure our next practice would be when the sun was bright and high in the sky. Not early in the morning as they thought at that time of day, the water would be too cold.

Made sense to me. The water would warm up during the day and of course, would be colder in the morning and warmer in the afternoon.

But…

One guest had brought a thermometer to check our human observation of the senses and scientifically measure the temperature. And guess what?

The temperature barely changed. The water in the pool maintained between 84 and 86 degrees every time we looked at it!

But how could that be? The water definitely felt colder at times and warmer at other times.

I am not a scientist, but I believe it all has to do with the temperature of the air. When the air temp exceeded the temperature of the water, the water felt cold, regardless of its real temperature. And when the air temp was below the air temperature, the water felt warm and enjoyable.  It didn’t’ matter the actual temperature of the water. Our perception changed based on what was happening outside the water. The temperature was constant, but the temperature of the air was not.

We are like the consistent water temperature.

Who we are on the inside is sort of like the temperature of the water, it fluctuates, but only slightly. However, it may not seem that way based on what is happening outside of us.

When we are faced with adversity, our sympathetic nervous system may kick in and we may seem angry or sad. But WE are NOT anger or sadness, we are still the person we have always been.

Or perhaps when faced with a challenge, we step up. We become laser-focused and determined. Did we change or is it the outside situation that is simply highlighting a part of us that has always been there?

Life can bring turmoil to our lives. It can bring joy to our lives. Yet, no matter the circumstances, aren’t we still that same person? The perception of who we are seems to change. In reality, it is what is happening on the outside that brings about that illusion.

Most of the time, not always, as sometimes we do make significant changes in our disposition, but for the most part, who we are is consistent. Our values are at our core, and they lead us through each situation.

It is the situation that changes, not us.

VIA Character Strengths

This is how I’ve gained a better understanding of the VIA Character Strengths, a tool I use in my coaching practice. In the early part of this century, Martin Seligman and Christopher Peterson led a 3-year study to research, and classify the positive aspects or traits found in human beings. They studied cultures across the globe, throughout time, and even pop culture. This culminated in a list of 24 Character Strengths, classified within 6 virtues, and the movement to focus individual awareness on the positive aspects of what makes us who we are.

VIA stands for Values in Action. I see these character strengths as 24 human values. Values we all possess, but in different ways. Thus, making each of us a unique personality, a unique individual. This study is at the forefront of the positive psychology movement.

Positive psychology is about focusing on what is right with us, rather than what is wrong with us. We spend so much time in our lives trying to correct our flaws, instead of focusing our energies on our positive qualities. Research shows that when we focus on the positive and let go of our negatives, we are happier. We achieve more. We become who we are meant to be.

Our Values are Consistent

For the most part, our values, our character strength profile, remain consistent. I’ve taken the survey a number of times. And although some strengths move a bit, there hasn’t been a groundbreaking change without me mindfully working at it. (Zest is one that I mindfully worked at and moved higher up on the scale, meaning I now use it more often. It was always there, I simply decided I wanted to use more of it. You can read more about that journey in my eclectic thoughts from 4/15/2021)

You see, it’s because we are who we are; a unique individual being with our own way of living and seeing the world.

When the world presents different situations, we utilize what is already inside of us to navigate through the challenges. It’s not that we changed, the outside world has changed and thus the perception of reactions may seem different. But just like the temperature of the water in the pool was consistently between 84 and 86 degrees, we are consistent in who we are, in our values in action.

Look at it another way. We all have the value or character strength of love. We all have a relationship, whether it be a friend, partner, parent, or caregiver that we actively love. Yet, we may not always show it. It’s not that our love for them changes, the external world changes. Perhaps they need our support, so we call them daily, check in and lend a hand. But then there are times they are busy with their lives, maybe their career or studies, and we don’t talk to them for weeks or even months. Did our love for them change? No, the circumstances outside of us changed.

We are the temperature of the water.

We are constant. Without intention, we don’t change. Our circumstances and the world around us changes, bringing out different aspects of our Internal Self. But those different aspects are always there.

Curious to know more about your Character Strength Profile?  Take the free survey and schedule a discovery call with me!  Discover what makes you, well you!

Or join me on Thursday, May 19 for a Free Workshop – Create You, where you will learn you will discover 3 Simple tools to Create the Life You Crave, one of them being using your character strengths!

The post Things Aren’t Always What They Seem appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

by Kathi Szabo

I truly believe that without a clear vision of what you really want in life, you will never be satisfied.

But, I also believe that our desires, our vision of what we want our lives to be, is always changing, rarely staying the same.

First, when we achieve our desires, our mind notices other things that are in line with our first desire. For example, say our dream is to travel to Machu Pichu. Once we achieve that, we notice so many other wonders in the world we want to see. Or maybe once we visit Machu Pichu, we’re satisfied and we want to settle down and buy a house.

Then there are times we get closer to our dreams and desires, and something about it doesn’t feel right. We notice something different and become more intrigued. We decide to make adjustments to our dream based on what we know now.

That’s life. Life is always changing. We are always changing. Others are always changing. Things happen that we have no control over yet it impacts us. We can choose how it impacts us, but it still impacts us.

When Mark and I started Eclectic Well-Being, we had one clear vision, to help people live better lives. It was pretty simple. We knew that included the internal self, thoughts, emotions, basically your mindset. We also knew it include the body. Not that we want everyone to have Instagram Yogi bodies, but we want to help others live a healthy life, so they can live longer and enjoy more of their life. And we knew helping people live better lives included connection. Connection to community and connection to nature.

The Changing Vision of Eclectic Well-Being

Last year we worked hard to create a platform similar to what we created at our yoga studio, offer classes and workshops, a membership site, and membership perks. That was actually deviation from our original  vision of wanting to partner with other businesses, sending clients to the best yoga studio, recommending small gyms, referring our clients to other wellness modalities based on their needs. But somehow, we overlooked our actual desire. The familiarity of running a membership-based business was still ingrained in our minds.

By the end of the year, we knew we needed to change. We weren’t serving our clients by having a little of this and a little of that.  Community and Connection though was still important to us.  How could we focus on one to one coaching but still create community and connection?

We shifted our vision again and decided to continue to include monthly connection events, but also include connecting more with our community of other wellness providers. Our original business idea was centered around working and supporting others who could serve our clients in ways we couldn’t. After all, we aren’t experts in everything, and we envisioned a community of wellness providers working with us. We overlooked this clarity because it was such a change from how we’d been operating the past few years. We were comfortable in operating a yoga studio and we tried like heck to stay in that comfort zone even though that was not our desire.

Overlooking our real vision because we are comfortable with what we know, happens to many of us. Comfort, or certainty as Tony Robbins would call it, is a need we all have. And sometimes moving out of our comfort zone, even when it’s a desire of ours, can be challenging.

Dreams Change

Now 4 months into 2022 and my lenses, my clarity, need readjusting again.

Retreats were more of a side note in our business model. It was always in the back of my mind, but it was not my focus. However, since planning and executing our DREAM Retreat to St Croix, and selling out our Women’s Only Self Care Day Retreat next month – Retreats are now my passion. It’s what I dream about! It’s what I truly love doing!  I love the planning. I love the traveling. I love meeting new people. I love the challenge of being in new surroundings, even when they aren’t quite what you expected.  And I believe Retreats are life-changing!  They are magical and I want everyone to experience them.  That’s why today I just confirmed our second DREAM Retreat but this time to Amorgos, Greece! Yoga, Mindfulness, Meditation, Mindset, Self Discovery and Exploring the Greek Island Culture.

Time for New Lenses!

We experience life and we see things differently. Having clarity is great, but we must notice when the vision becomes fuzzy and blurry. When it does, it’s time to reassess and go back to the drawing board!

So how do we know when it’s time to change our Dreams?

It’s when you no longer are excited by the dream.

It’s when working for the dream is a daunting task.

When it’s no longer fun.

When it no longer brings you joy.

But what if your current dream no longer brings you joy, but you don’t know what will?

You feel stuck.

You may be living the dream you thought you wanted, but something is still lacking.

That’s what the Total MindShift is all about.

It’s taking the time to shift our thought patterns so we can begin to dream again. To let the world be our playground. To listen, truly listen to our heart’s desires.

I practice what I teach. Whenever I feel frustrated, or I feel myself avoiding things, I stop and go inward.

I dig into my psyche. Observing my thoughts and taking note of the observation.

How am I feeling? Are there limiting beliefs stopping me from pursuing my dreams? Do I just need some time to myself?

Mindfulness and Self Care are key.

Finding New Clarity – AGAIN…

So if you are feeling you need to get clarity again. That perhaps your dreams have shifted. Here’s what I recommend.

1. If you don’t journal start, or at least have a practice as you work through getting your clarity. I love the exercise from “An Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron of morning pages. Write 3 pages I believe even if it’s the same thing over and over. Just write and get it out.
2. Sit and breathe. This is great advice for whenever anxiety or frustration creeps up. Focused awareness meditation of simply noticing your breath. This simple technique calms the nervous system and will help move you into a powerful state, or the parasympathetic nervous system.
3. Find Gratitude for what you currently have. This is key. Even if we’ve recently experienced loss or tragedy, we can find gratitude for other things in our lives. Without gratitude, we cling to frustration and anger for what we don’t have. This will never propel us to living our dreams.
4. Clarify your values. There are numerous exercises out there to do this. One I like is from the book “Who’s in Your Room” by Emery, Misner, and Sapio.
5. Hire a Coach. Coaches are trained to not solve the issue for you, not to layout your dream based on any survey or quiz. No, coaches are here to support and help you find the answers in yourself. Because it is already inside you, you just need to bring it to the surface.
6. Live. Love. Laugh. Life is whatever you create, and you can only create when you are embracing the current moment.

Living in Motion

What I’ve learned over the past 7 years, is that my dreams and desires are always in motion. That my values guide me. And that the universe is always working for my greatest good! That last belief is faith. Faith that our dreams are worth pursuing. Faith that we are here for a reason. Faith that love always wins. Faith in ourselves and those around us.

If you’d like to explore working together and creating a Total MindShift so you can consciously create a life you love, schedule a no-pressure call with me, and let’s see where the road goes.

And if you want to experience a mini DREAM Retreat this summer, join us for a weekend in the Poconos. Experience Yoga Nidra, a mindfulness walk, morning meditation, river rafting and connection to community and to nature. Check it out! Limited spaces!

The post When It’s Time To Replace Your Lenses appeared first on Eclectic Well-Being.

The Vernal Equinox, the first day of Spring, was once considered the beginning of the new year. It is the start of planting season, signifying renewal, growth, and life.

Farmers are readying the soil and beginning to sow their crops. Birds are nesting and laying eggs for the next generation. Wildlife that has been slow or dormant over the winter emerges looking for food and a new spring home.

Even the name itself, Spring, brings to mind movement, change and regeneration!

No wonder many of us reset our goals, our intentions, and our homes – so many of us participate in “Spring Cleaning!”

Why not spring clean our minds so we can reset, and plant new thoughts?

Clear the Cobwebs

Why is it that one day I notice one cobweb and suddenly they are everywhere!  I can go for months without seeing a one and then all of a sudden the light hits the wall, the ceiling, the window corner, and WOW! A huge cobweb! I wonder how I didn’t see it. And then another appears. And another and I’m spending the day dusting and eliminating them wondering if guests or others who have been to my home noticed them in disgust.

It’s the same with our thoughts.

A cobweb is simply a spider web that is no longer in use, but it collects dust and pollen, and dirt. The cobwebs of our mind are those thoughts that no longer serve us, yet we keep them around. They attract like thoughts and emotions that also don’t serve us, but until we remove them they remain in our minds, collecting negativity.

Spring is the perfect time to dust out those thoughts. Release them along with those attached to them. These are the limiting beliefs that we may have thought we overcame, but are still lingering in the back of our minds.

Dust out those lingering thoughts by first acknowledging they are still there. For example, this past week during our coaching call with our coach (yes, coaches have coaches – we need support too!) Mark realized that the block he was having was the same limiting belief he thought he had cleared out long ago. But here it was, resurfacing when the light hit it just right.  Just like cobwebs.

Let Go of Limiting Beliefs

It’s important to recognize that many of our limiting beliefs are so ingrained in our minds the cobwebs remain hidden until there is a light that brings them out of the darkness. That’s why when we notice them, we clean them out.

It’s all about the practice we call, the Power of Decision. It’s something I teach all my Total MindShift clients and speak about in different talks. Mark talks also teaches it in his Well-Being 101 Call.

Beliefs are simply decisions our mind accepts as pure fact. And when we find some limiting beliefs, those cobwebs that are collecting dust, we simply need to make a new decision and clean out those cobwebs!

Plant Seeds of Intention

If we want to grow a life of abundance, we must plant those seeds.  And we must have complete clarity on what we want to grow.

If we want beans, we don’t plant seeds from a butternut squash!  If we want violets to grow, we don’t plant daisies.

It’s the same with our dreams and desires. We must plant the intention, but we must have complete clarity on what we want to grow.

Spring is the ideal time to look at the life you are creating and decide if this is still what you want. We change. We grow. Our dreams and desires will evolve. Allow yourself to let go of dreams and plant seeds for new ones.

Create intentions for where you are today. Be absolutely clear on what it is you want. Then plant the seed with a clear vision of what will sprout.

Nurture Your Garden

As spring turns to summer, it is important to nurture our dreams, just as we nurture a garden of flowers or vegetables. Watering them when they need a drink, clearing out the weeds, just like clearing out the cobwebs.

Our dreams can have difficulty becoming reality when we don’t take the time to nurture them. We need to support them with action. This could be taking a class to learn more about what we want. Hiring a coach to help keep us accountable. Talking with others who can help us. If we do something every day that is aligned with our desires, we are walking the path and it will lead us to our dreams.

So get to that Spring Cleaning of your Mind. Clean out the cobwebs and dust. Replace it with new empowering beliefs. Then plant a spring garden of intentions. With a bit of nurturing, our seeds will grow into our desires. Consciously creating a life we love!

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When we decided to become coaches, some in our family wondered what exactly does a coach do?  Who hires you?  Why do they hire you?

Let’s first discuss what coaches don’t do.  Coaches are not therapists.  We don’t try to solve your problems by analyzing your past experiences or diagnosing any cognitive, psychological or emotional disorders.  In fact, we don’t try to solve your problems for you in any way.

What we do is listen, pose questions, and offer observations.  Many like us, also incorporate teaching into our practice.  Teaching, as an invitation, not that what I teach is the only option, but as an invitation to try some practices and techniques that have been useful for others.

Why hire a coach? 
Well why do some people hire a trainer?  Because we want support, guidance, and accountability.  Same reasons you want to hire a coach, but instead of working on your physical goals, we work on life goals; whether that be your health, your mindset, your career, your finances, your relationships, and other areas of your life on which you choose to work. All coaches are trained to listen, respond with questions, offer support and be direct and honest.

Coaches help you find solutions within yourself to make the changes needed to have what you truly desire.   This could be a myriad of things.  Perhaps you want to stop having the same arguments with your spouse.  Maybe you want to figure out if the career you are in is really what you want to be doing.  Maybe you’ve noticed a change in body weight and want to figure out how to still enjoy food but not keep gaining weight as you get older.  Perhaps you are celebrating your child’s wedding and having the house back to yourselves, but now what are you going to do?

What do all these scenarios have in common?  They involve going inward, exploring options, finding clarity as to what YOU really want and then coming up with an action plan.  Our lives are habitual.  We repeat the same patterns.  In order to make changes, we need to stop doing the same things.  To paraphrase Einstein, “Insanity is repeating the same behavior and expecting different results.”  That’s most of us.  We don’t realize we do the same things, but we do.  It’s the way our brain is connected.

Why can’t you simply make these changes on your own? Well you can try. However, because science has shown that 90% of our thoughts are repetitive, (and 80% of those are negative) most people find themselves in the same thought pattern. They find it difficult to shift on their own and see the multitude of possibilities.

Example, many of us think “the problem” is our current job. So we find a new job, thinking everything will be solved. But in reality, we are repeating the same behaviors and usually we find ourselves unhappy again in a short time. A coach interrupts these habits, offers questions and ideas that will prompt your brain to think differently, and provide guidance with new ideas and potential solutions. By asking thoughtful but direct questions, coaches provide a safe environment for you to reprogram your brain, opening up new possibilities!

Eclectic Well-Being focuses on Mindset and Nutrition, two areas where many people struggle but with simple changes, get exceptional results!

The Total Mind Shift is an 8 week program centered on discovering what makes you, well, you!  Exploring your character, your personality, your hopes and dreams.  Ensuring you have complete clarity as to what life you want to live, what brings you joy and abundance!  We focus on small changes you can make to truly be the person you want to be and have the life you desire.  At the end of 8 weeks you have a set of tools you can use whenever you find yourself falling back into old patterns.  If you need further support, we also have one-to-one as-needed sessions for past clients.

Metabolic Mindfulness is a 10-week program designed for people who want to identify as healthy, fit individuals, but aren’t quite sure where to begin, or have experienced setbacks in the past. This program covers everything you need to know to live consistently at your ideal body weight and never need to “go on a diet” ever again, while still eating food that tastes good and makes you feel good. We believe there is no “one best diet” out there that will work for everyone. Our program helps you to figure out what’s going to work for you, for the rest of your life.

Curious if Coaching can help you live with more joy, health and abundance?  Schedule a Discovery Call with either of us!

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